My apologies for not uploading a new chapter over the past 2 months. I’ve been busy studying for my highschool finals, which I passed now and I simply needed a break (;
Derek’s Pov.
Three more hours of searching. Me and Scott called up the others and searched all around the forest and the area, but we didn’t find the Sheriff. All I could think about was Stiles and what he told me. He would never forgive me if his dad died and that somehow made me want to find him even more.
Everyone being exhausted we decided to continue the search after a couple of hours of sleep. No one could concentrate anymore; it wasn’t going to make any sense searching now.
The weather is awfully cold for the time of the year. It’s almost freezing you can say. I used to find it comforting. The ice cold wind clinging to my skin untill it started to hurt making me feel a different pain then the one I felt inside.
Walking home I can’t help it but think about Stiles. I’m sure he has been searching as well, but walking through his streets I can smell his scent and know he’s come home. But I also smell..
Anxiety.
That makes alarm bells ring somehow. It’s not just a little bit, it’s overwhelming. The boys heartbeat is far from what it should be.
Without a doubt I get onto the roof and get through the window. The lights in the bedroom are off, but those in the bathroom are on. Assuming he’s there I hurry in there finding Stiles in the corner, sitting against the cold wall only wearing his boxers as he tries to breathe, clenching his chest, eyes staring at me wide open and filled with fear.
I can’t help but notice the dark bruises on his shoulders. I know I did that..
“Stiles..” I breathe. I know I’m good pretending I don’t care, pretending I hate him, but the feelings I have for him are quite the opposite of what I make him and the othes believe they are.
I know he’s mad at me, but he’s not pushing me away when I kneel down next to him. “Stiles what’s happening?” Sure I expect someone who’s dad just has been taken away to feel really bad, but this, I can’t consider this normal.
“I’m…” He tried to take enough air in to speak, but fails serveral times before he manages to crack out the word panicattack. On the inside I’m freaking out, but I try to stay calm. If I manage to do that I can maybe bring it over on him and get him calm that way.
“What do you do when you have one? Do you have medications for it?” I never knew he had panic attacks in the first place. I wonder if Scott even knows. He shakes his head no. “Do you know what helps?” He shakes his head no.
We’re running out of options here.
I move my arm under his and the other one under his legs, carrying him bridal style into the bedroom as I lay him down onto his bed, kicking my shoes off as I lay down next to him after covering him with the blanket. Considering the window was open and the fact it was cold and the fact that he’s only wearing a boxer I assume part of the reason why he was shaking so badly.
“Stiles, I need you to concentrate on your breathing okay?” He boy was clenching his chest, pupils blown wide as he just stared at me like I said something stupid. “I C-can’t..” He whimpered. “You can baby.” Baby.. I just called him baby. I mentally slap myself. I can’t let this guy know I like him.
Stiles seems to be too busy trying to not freak out even more to notice as he to my suprises moves closer against me. I wrap my arms around him; thinking that he will be thinking I’m trying to help him and nothing more. “Take a deep breathe in. Just listen to my breathing and copy it yeah?” He nods, buries his face in the crook of my neck which is when I realize this is the closest I’ve ever gotten to him without hurting him.
I whisper comforting things in his ear. It’s been a long time since I knew how to comfort someone.
Comfort was something I longed for myself.
Slowly he manages to control his breathing as it doesn’t take long before I feel him relax against me as he appears to be alseep. I’m not so sure what to do. Should I leave? Would he suspect something if I stay?
I look through his room and wonder what he does here in his free time. It hits me that he had a normal life before his bestfriend turned into a wolf. He’s not a hunter, he’s not a wolf, he could easily move somewhere else and not have anything to do with all of this; but he doesn’t. He stays, does everything he can to help us, puts his mind to use.
He’s brave.
I never had a normal life. I’ve been a wolf from the day since I was born. I’ve been hunted on since the day I was born and no one even appreciated what I’ve done for them, but I never appreciated what Stiles did either. Not untill now.
All I did was tell him how he’s screwing things up and I’m sure it hurts him..
I hurt him.
I keep telling myself that I help him by doing so, so he won’t find out that I actually like him, but what if I’m wrong? Ofcourse I’m not wrong, it wouldn’t change anything.
I slowly sit up, deciding that I should leave. Swinging my legs over the edge of Stiles’ bed I’m about to grab my shoes when slim fingers work their way around my left wrist, making me turn. Stiles’ deep brown eyes stare at me and I sense fear again. “Don’t leave.. Please..?” He whispers. I blow the air in my lungs out through my nose and nod slowly, laying back down.
Once again I’m suprised when he pushes his body against me, burying his face into my chest. “I’m sorry.” It’s out before I realize it’s out. “What for..?” Stiles mumbled, obviously tired. For everything is what I want to answer, but I don’t get it past my lips. “Your shoulders.” I simply answer. He nods slowly. He’s tired and so am I.
The last thing I see before I sink of to sleep are his light pink full lips that were blue just a couple of minutes ago.
-
I felt Stiles stir against me the next morning, causing me to snap out of sleep and be fully awake. The guy turned slightly and then rubbed his eyes, shivering slightly because I forgot to close the window and he was barely wearing anything.
“Heey.” I tell him sitting up. He looks at me, first seems a bit confused but then remembers last night and gives me a tired nod. “Do you want something to eat?” He shakes his head no. “I wanna go look for my dad..” He claims, standing up as he walks over to his closet to get some clothes out.
“Stiles, you’re probably going to pass out if you don’t eat anything. Like that’s going to be helpfull.” I guess you could say I’m back to my harsh self. He just shrugs and takes on his trousers, body moving in an insecure way as if he’s trying to hide as much of himself as possible eventhough he’s standing right in front of me in clear daylight.
This boy is not going to take proper care of himself. I get a hold his bag and walk over to his closet, grabbing some random stuff. “What are you doing?” Stiles asks.
“You’re going to stay with me untill we find your dad and believe me; we will.”
Comment what you guys think about Derek letting his guard down. I understand that this is not like Derek, but how else is he going to let Stiles in huh? ;p
Vote if you want me to continue this story! (:
