Broken Wings - a poetry collection

wtf

why am i so needy?
why don't you love me?
why do i have a family but
why no friends with me?
what is meant for me?
i live with forty other women
but never felt so alone
the days drag on
the nights so long
the fear fights my bravery
the questions in my head burn up inside me
they make me stop, ponder, think
they make me hate me
they make me hide myself behind locked doors,
they make me so afraid to be me
they make me afraid to say hello
the fear, questions, anxieties, "too awkward, not good enough's" in my head
for i know they all leave in the end
for i sit here spilling my head onto this white page
for i sit on a bed wondering if this is how it feels to be dead, hiding
from anything, everyone
fuck happiness, it never felt so lonely, so cold.

wtf
3/9/18