Convenience

Part 91

David reached for the menus on the table and handed a menu to Beatrice. He picked up their earlier conversation. No point in avoiding this. If he wanted their relationship to continue, he needed to put his cards on the table. No matter how much it would cost him: his pride, his self-respect. Obvious his aloofness, arrogance, overconfidence would have to go. Time for honesty. Humility. Truth.

She needed to know. How he felt. Then, and now. About her leaving him.

He revealed wearily. "When you moved out of Auckland," He rolled his lip, took a moment and then continued, "I concluded that was your signal that we were going our separate ways."

She raised her eyes. Beatrice could hear honesty in his tone.

He said honestly, "It never occurred to me that you'd mind. He carried on explaining, "We didn't have any feelings for each other."

Yes, Beatrice kept that word silent. Back then, yes, they didn't have any feelings for each other. Now, she wasn't sure. She knew she was an independent woman. But she was always straight with herself. And today she had so many unexpected feelings. It felt like an earthquake. Everything had moved. Her pulse. Her thoughts. Her feelings. But she was not about to change her life for him, not again.

"I didn't think it would bother you." David did not need to hear the mortification in her tone in her voice to know that she was hurt. David watched her face. He could see her intuition, leave, again, just like five years ago, avoid pain. He said quietly, "We were only seen together at the funerals."

Her head snapped back as if she had been hit. That time of her life was fully of sadness.

David glanced across at Beatrice. He said in a no nonsense tone, "We were never seen out together" He wondered if he'd blown it back them. And now he was wondering if he had a second chance.

"True." She mulled. She continued in a disgusted tone of voice, "We never went out." She shrugged, dropped her gaze and pretended to read the menu. "You came to the house, when my grandfather was alive." She could not afford to show her emotion. Her grandfather was a huge influence in her life. Talking about her grandfather always made her sad. She fought down the tears that always threatened to spill whenever she thought of her grandfather. She missed her grandfather. He would be really pleased with her, and he would be really proud of her. She knew that.

"Your grandfather was good to me." David said gently, "Really kind. Good listener." He took a breath. "Without my grandfather, after his death, well, your grandfather helped me."

She replied calmly, "I know." She glanced over at him, waited until he made eye contact then said, "He gave you money. I remember."

"It wasn't just the money." David corrected. He shrugged his shoulders. "It was the way he looked after me." He took a breath. "Of course, I knew it was an arrangement, coming around for dinner, listening to him, getting advice, as a young man, trying to manage a huge enterprise."

Beatrice shook her head. "It was more than an arrangement." She corrected him. "It wasn't just a plan." She frowned at David. "Between you and grandfather." Then Beatrice softly admitted, "Grandfather liked you." She remembered how her grandfather and David talked, really talking, about everything. Laughing. She remembered that.

David nodded. "I liked him. Really liked him."

Beatrice smiled. "He liked it when you came for dinner. He really enjoyed your company."

Silence. As they both remembered that time.

A short time, given her grandfather died within months after their marriage. But Beatrice knew that her grandfather liked seeing David. And Beatrice missed him.

A very short time. David knew that her grandfather was a very special man. And David missed him.

David said, "But we, you and me, we had never been together. You wouldn't know if you enjoyed my company. I think we barely talked at those dinners. The normal greetings."

"Normal stuff." She agreed. She had never asked him about his day. He had never asked her about her day.

"And we never lived together."

"I know." She glanced across at him.

He folded his arms. He flicked Beatrice a questioning glance, and he watched her. "Did you want to?"

That shattered her equilibrium. Calmness fled.