Convenience

Part 93

"I'm surprised to learn you've been keeping tabs on me." David leaned closer and his eyes challenged hers. His forehead was practically touching hers. "But according to you, you don't date at all!"

Beatrice snorted and leaned back to put a bit of distance between them. "Tabs? Hardly." She snorted. "It is difficult to read the papers without encountering some image or story, I accept, mainly in the social columns, about you and your latest." She shrugged with a nonchalance she was far from feeling, "Hardly keeping tabs!" She huffed. "And to be honest, after about a year, the society pages stopped registering. I have better things to do."

Which was a bit of a white lie. It wasn't that they stopped registering. It was that she had deliberately stopped reading them.

Five years should have built up immunity. But every time she accidentally read or saw an article with him and another woman, it felt as if someone had kicked her in the stomach. Beatrice looked straight at him as she asked directly, "Do they still all fit into one of those four categories or has the supply run dry and you have had to branch out?" She watched him closely.

"Ouch." He accepted the verbal hit. Back then he was pretty sure that she didn't want this marriage.

Seconds passed. He leaned back. "We should order?" He nodded at he menu. He had noticed that the waiter was loitering. Obvious the waiter was trying to figure out if he should return to their table to get their order, as he had probably noticed that they had picked up their menu. "And while I am happy to prolong this dinner, I know that you have looked at your watch over and over!"

Her cheeks flushed. Was she that obvious? Beatrice opened her menu, and took her time to choose her starter and main.

While she took the time, David reviewed his thoughts and their conversation.

Five years ago, he thought she wanted out of this convenience marriage. Just like him.

She left. He let her. That was the crux of this situation. They assumed stuff: points, what matters, events, feelings, wishes, what was important. They all had consequences. He perused the menu in front of him. But his mind was on other matters. He reviewed his past with her.

The problem now, was that both were now at different points in their lives, or at least it appeared. He wasn't sure that she was willing to give their relationship a chance. Because of his behaviour over the last five years. His relationships, with others. That was also the crux of this situation. He could understand. From her position, he had cheated. But in his mind, he wasn't cheating: They weren't in a relationship. Maybe on paper. But not in a real relationship. He knew, in his heart, and head, he would never cheat on his real wife. That was going to be hard to convince her that he would never cheat his wife, given, for her position, he had! That was the core of this problem. Caught between a rock and a hard place. Bottom line, he had dug a hole, over a period of five years. Clamber out of that hole, was going to be a real problem, and it might take more than just this dinner.

Of course he had his business troubles, and when she took off, it was one less thing to worry about. What matters, events, feelings, just merged into a simple plan. No complications. She would live her life, and he would live his life. No complications. No need to give up anything. But he had given up, the best thing in his life. Just a shame that he has taken over five years to realise that.

He knew that he had taken the simple, uncomplicated, undemanding route. But he could do complicated, demanding routes! His business took a lot of his time, dealing with hard, difficult situations: complicated routes. Demanding. Yet he had given up his personal life, to avoid that complicated route. Taken the simple route.

He let her leave. When he thinks about this situation, this route, with her, he knew he was about to make another mistake. A big mistake. Letting her go, now, was wrong. David looked askance before he smiled. This woman was amazing.

"What?" She lifted her eyes from the menu and frowned when she saw his smile. "Saw something that you like?

He nodded. "Yes." He saw her eyes getting wary, so he lied, "Something on the menu. My favourite!"

"Oh."

"Crevettes." He said, scanning the starter section, and was pleased to see the first item in the starter was his favourite! He smiled.

Beatrice was worried about his smile! She got the impression that he was strong willed. She knew that. She mumbled. "Thwarting. A lot of effort for those." He would need a finger bowl after he peels the Crevettes.

"Maybe, a lot of effort, but worth it." He replied.

She was starting to put her menu on the table, when that sentence stopped her completing her action. Now what was he up to? She flashed him an uncertain, slightly bewildered look. He was definitely unto something.

The exchanged speaking glances. And then the waiter arrived at their table.