Gotta Go

|nineteen|

"What happened."
"Addie, I don't think it's a good idea to tell you yet." Zach spoke up, fluffing my pillow. "I want to know." I repeated myself. "Man, we have to tell here." Conner spoke this time, it felt so odd to be with Conner in this moment I wanted to be the girl he thought I was but more importantly right now I needed to know how to repair myself, my image and how to fix it all. At the same time however I knew nothing about Conner I was just drawn to him somehow. I didn't know what exactly to call him I didn't know how I felt about him- I didn't even know his last name, what mess had I gotten myself into?

"Here Addie, this is what happened-"

Addie collapsed in the arms of a random stranger, hair wildly out of order, clothes smeared with paint and blood, bruises everywhere on her tiny body. The man she had collapsed on- a tall man, one Madam Paris fancied, with deep brown hair pushed to the side, a black Italian suit with black shoes and a small girl in his lap. Madam Paris' high pitches shriek had turned all the attention on her, however some frequently stole glances at the hidden Porter, the coloring quickly draining from her face yet she was so small and peaceful just laying there. "You FOOLS, the girl is not important! Someone! Rush me to the hospital" but no one moved, Rosalie, in the corner with her eyes fixed on her mother and the glass stuck in her thigh, the blood slowly staining her dress and falling down her leg- let out a shriek possibly higher than her mothers and burst into tears. "THEY'RE ALL GONNA DIE!" The men were snapped out of their trances, frantically rushing around and then two boys and a maid burst into the crowd pushing their way through the business men to find Addie, they picked her up and carried her outside while the maid and business men were already calling ambulances. Zach felt for pulses but frantically couldn't find any and started giving CPR, to give Addie a fighting chance at life again. Conner who was fueled with rage, stood in shock at the scene he had witnessed he wanted to act out and do anything he could to help Addie, he would even go through what she had if it meant she didn't have to but then another thought crossed his mind: football. It was foolish of him to think of such things with he situation he was dealing with at hand but it's all he could think about as the ambulance approached the house and he saw them pick up Addies body and quickly put it in the ambulance and within a moment she was gone again. Zach pulled him out of his trance and to his car where he fumbled with the keys before zooming out of the neighborhood and following the ambulance as close as he could. Conner however was brought back to a different time in his mind, one similar to the one he was in now. Three and a half years ago when he has just moved, alone in the world, his family was falling apart before his eyes they were oh so close to a divorce and he was only blaming himself for all of it, hearing them fight almost every night and his sister staying up way to late crying. The silent 'family' dinners he had to face and the wall that was slowly rising between them all. It was this time of his 8th grade year when he was only 13 years old he made one fatal mistake because like today he could not think, or act, or say, or do. It was a warm day where the autumn leaves where changing and he had just finished his run to clear his head, his only problem was that he was lost. He ended up near the park and feeling so hopeless and alone he sank down on the nearby fence. It was also this time that a very pretty girl came walking down the same road and saw the poor boy in his dismantled state. She knew who he was and all of his family problems but he had no idea who she was or the reputation she held. To her, he would only be another one she conquered but to him, he thought she was an angel sent to help and restore him. "Hi! I'm Tiffany aren't you Conner?" He looked up at her nodded slightly, she was wearing a crop top that was orange to match the leaves and her brown hair that reminded him so much of his sisters hair color but was much longer and naturally straight, she had jeans that her finger tips ran past slightly and he stood up after she introduced herself. He realized, slightly embarrassed he was only wearing his running shorts- no shirt only black as night long  shorts and black tennis shoes. "You look like you need to talk, wanna come home with me? It can just be me and you and I bet I'll make you feel better." He didn't process all she said but nodded and followed her down a road back into the neighborhood. He realized that no one was home but didn't say anything, he realized they went up to her room and she shut and locked the door behind him, but he didn't say anything.

And that autumn day many things happened, Conner was destroyed and his problems didn't get fixed but got worse, until Zach came along. But like that autumn day he felt exactly like he did on this autumn day where a girl- he was too shy to admit he thought he was in love with- was speeding down the road to the nearest hospital he had no idea if she was alive or dead on the verge of fighting death but all he could say was: "live, live for me addie."