Disconnected || lashton {au}

Chapter 3

Ashtons POV

I cant do this, I'm having a fucking panic attack I can't breathe I can't do his, I can't go back to school. Oh god I feel like I'm going to pass out.

Oh for fucks sakes, "I'm coming! Calm your tits" I replied to mums attempts to get me out of bed by screaming at me from the other end of the house. She doesn't bother trying to feed me anymore, she knows I either throw it away or throw it up.

I threw my covers to the other side of my bed and stumbled around trying to get these goddamn skinny jeans on. I shoved my phone in the pocket and pulled a ripped nirvana shirt over my head. I tied a bandana to the back of my head and wrestled my boots onto my feet. I mean I'm certainly not narcissistic or anything, the bullies kind of beat that out of you, but I'm not that bad looking I guess, I also haven't done anything to them so I need to know why they beat the shit out of me every other day.

I took one last glance in the mirror and decided that yes, I actually am that bad looking, my hairs sticking out everywhere and my smile is crooked; I couldn't look happy if I tried.

I tightened my bracelets so my scars weren't visible and rushed downstairs, almost tripping over my feet. Mum was in the car honking the horn waiting. "You're going to make friends, you're going to get good grades and you're going to be happy, okay ash? You can do this" Ash. She knows I hate that. And no, I cannot do this. I just groaned and looked out the window as she started driving.

"Bye baby! I'll be here this afternoon." Mum called out the window as I got out of the car. I put my head down, but I knew there were people laughing at me. I looked up and I heard a familiar chuckle nearby.

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuckety fucking shit.

No way, I've been here for like 30 seconds, I don't need this already.

Jace walks beside me with a sick grin plastered on his lips. "Aw, mummy's little baby, off to school" he coos, and his 2 douchebags of friends, Calum and harry appear behind him. They look at each other knowingly and both sing, "guess whose back, back again, faggots back, tell a friend" I was about to roll my eyes, that was the lamest thing I've ever heard, but jace interrupts; well grabs me and drags me along, harry and Calum quickly joining him.

I'm kicking, yelling but he covers my mouth and I bite his finger, hard, causing him to almost let go as I struggled more but his grip just tightened on me but he whipped his hand away from my face. There are deep bite marks in his finger, ha. But they don't stop, I'm too weak.

HOW IS NOBODY NOTICING THIS WE ARE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FUCKING FIELD AND SOMEBODY IS BEING DRAGGED AWAY KICKING AND SCREAMING. HELLO

Oh that's right, nobody cares about the lonely faggot with approximately 1 friend.
Speaking of, where is Michael? I need help, he better fucking get here soon.

Too late. We are at the bathroom and they basically throw me on the floor. Jace starts kicking me in the stomach, while Calum kneels down far too close to my face and whispers, "fag, you deserve every bit of this and you know it." I do know it, I know it because I've heard that fucking sentence too many times before. I was laying there, my eyes tightly shut, trying to ignore the pain in my ribs and Calum hot breath on my face. Suddenly there is a sharp pain in my cheek and my eyes shot open, Calum had a grip on my face, so fucking tight it almost hurt more than the kicking and he growled, "you do know it, right? Tell me, tell me you're a fag that doesn't deserve to live."

"I-I'm a fag that d-doesn't deserve to l-live" that hurt so much, coming from my own mouth, but before I could think about it too much, I was clutching my face and a piercing pain shooting through my nose, I couldn't feel much besides the pain and the tears stinging my eyes, but I knew it was bleeding.

With one more swift move, Calum ripped the bandana off my head, along with most of my goddamn hair, surely, stood up and walked away, jace finished his assault and followed after, while harry stood in the corner, staring. Not ready to attack, but not sympathetic either. Kind of just... Emotionless. His eyes were black holes that I could see no light in, I couldn't read his expression.

I decided then and there I hated him the most, what the fuck was he even doing here, he wasn't going to help jace and Calum, he wasn't going to help me, he was just watching - staring.

I sat up slowly, trying my best to ignore the fact that my rib hurt so much I could barely breathe, and flipped harry off, feeling dumb as fuck right after, knowing he would probably hit me right then and there. But he just turned on his heel, slowly walking away, but I caught a glimmer of... Sadness? Guilt? Empathy? I have no clue but it was there, before he disappeared.

Fuck no, he can't be the one that's upset and hurt here, I'm bleeding in places I didn't know could bleed and he's looking broken. Fuck. No.

Lukes POV

"Holy fuck I swear to god I will smash you across the room shut the fuck up" I groaned as my alarm rang, I'm so not ready for school today. I grabbed my phone, stopping the annoying as fuck song, 'knee socks' by arctic monkeys.

I took my time getting dressed and ready and arrived at school on my old skateboard after missing first 2 periods, and I realised my misfits muscle tee was on inside out and my black jeans had a massive stain right below the left pocket. Damn. It was break time so I made my way over to where the seniors hang out, and there was a kid sitting in the corner with a black eye and unruly curls, clutching onto his torso like his life depended on it. He wore tons of bracelets it was kinda weird.

He looked up, but not to me, to the person sitting beside him; goddamnit, it was Michael. He looked really guilty and that kid looked on the verge of tears, but shook his head, seemingly reassuring old skunkhead. I gave up trying to listen in and looked around for somebody else.

I haven't seen Calum, it turned out we were at Jace's party the other night, Calum wouldn't get up though because his head wouldn't stop bleeding, so somebody took him to hospital. Guessing he got stitches or something, which is why he isn't here today. I didn't want to talk to Jace, he was kind of a huge douche and he's obviously using Calum so he can have another follower, and turns out Calum can be pretty cruel if he wants. Also that styles kid.. Harry. He's just wierd as fuck, he doesn't know what he's doing 75% of the time.

And I'm willing to bet they have something to do with that kid in the corner.

I spot glowing red hair over the other end of the field and recognise it as that girl for the party, Brodie I think. I walk over to her and she eyed my outfit, scince I hadn't been bothered to change it but smiled and introduced me to her friends anyway.

I wasn't really interested in this chick was on about.. Something about lip rings and how they're hot as fuck or something..
Oh shit.
"I'm gay." I interrupted her and her face immediately fell, why the fuck did I do that? Nobody knew that, people just thought I'd never had a girlfriend because I'm a "badass" and play hard to get.

Brodie squealed but quickly re-composed herself and assured she'd just always wanted a gay bestfriend. I was surprised, honestly, she doesn't seem like "that" type of girl.

I quickly changed the subject to that boy sitting with skunky, which probably made the whole "gay" thing worse but I wanted to Know what happened to the poor kid. He was in a year below us but some of the grade 11's hung around here aswell, clearly him and mike were so me of them. Mike? No.

"Oh, that's Austin,"
"Ashton" Brodie's explanation is cut off by her creepy ass friend correcting her.
"Right. Ashton." She continued, "he gets bullied by Jace and all that, I don't really know that much about him though, he tends to keep to himself a lot."

I admit, I'm a bitch, I'm not as bad as jace, but I am a bitch, that is why I couldn't figure out for the life of me why I felt the need to know more about this poor ashton kid sitting in the corner.

I do not fancy him, I see no reason to. He's not that attractive, maybe he is but whatever, I barely know anything about him. I do not fancy him.