seven stages of grief ; ethan. d

chapter six ; depression

   i sat in the cold, confined room, wobbling my legs back forth.

i was biting my nails habitually.

   "hi Ethan" a lady spoke softly while opening the door, "how are you feeling?"

   i stopped biting my nails and looked up at the lady angrily, "how do you think i feel?" i questioned, "my girlfriend was killed and my brother was the one who did it"

   "i know" she said, "i can only imagine how heartbroken you must feel"

   "i don't think you do"

   she gave a fake smiled and proceeded to sit across from me. she opened her file and began asking questions,

   "did you ever suspect your brother to be a violent killer?"

   i shook my head

   "was he in any a way a threat when you two were together?"

   i shook my head

   "we believe, Ethan" she paused, took a breath and proceeded, "that she was cheating on you with Grayson"

   i lifted my head up. tears instantly rolled down my face.

"we'll let you go home Ethan. but we'll need you back in a couple of weeks, okay?"

two weeks later

everyday it seems to be getting harder and harder to get out of bed in the morning. my mind is raced with unstoppable thoughts that i have lost control of.

i find myself rarely eating and taking care of myself. i haven't taken a proper shower in a couple days, i haven't been outside since last Monday, and i've been sleeping almost 20 hours a day.

my motivation to do anything is no longer there.

i have given up on myself and i don't know how to get myself back on track