One

Chapter Four- part two

   The tears were streaming down her cheeks as she drove, her mind not completely on where she was going or the road ahead of her. It was dangerous for her to drive in this condition, but she didn't care. She didn't care if anything bad happened to her, if she drove on the wrong side of traffic and got hit, if she drove into the trees, she didn't care.
   They were well into the shorter days of the autumn and winter months, the night sky already starting to appear yet it was only five. It would be darker than midnight soon, and she didn't plan on going home because of it.
   She comes to a stop, at wherever her subconscious decided to take her. And when she saw where she was, her mind fell back into reality at a dizzying pace. Why had she come here, of all places, why here. Phina had stopped on the street in front of Steve Harrington's house. She wanted to kick herself over and over again. Yet, at the same time, she knew that she wanted this, her subconscious knew, and that's what pushed her towards the door.
   The tears were still flowing, with no end in sight as she walked towards the door. Her feet moved on their own, not listening to any protests from the rational side of her brain. She came to a stop at the front door, freezing in place. What the hell am I doing, she asked herself. Her left hand rose without her consent to the doorbell, only pausing an inch from it.
   "God damnit," she cursed herself as she pushed the bell.
   The ring echoed in her mind, regret pushing forward as an answer. She wanted to run, to hide, but her feet wouldn't move. The only thing she could do was look down at her trembling hands, so much damage could be done with them.
   The lock clicked on the door and it pulled open. She didn't even look up to see him.
   "Phina," Steve asked, confusion clear in his voice.
   Her body shook as a new wave of fear and sadness hit her, tears streamed down her cheek.  
   Steve took a tentative step towards her, "Phina? What's happening."
   "I didn't know where else to go," she whispered, her voice thick with tears.
   He took another step towards her, "are you crying?"
   She didn't answer, but her body shook with a sob that she tried to contain. He placed a hand under her chin, lifting her head, forcing her to look at him.
   His heart came to a dead stop. He had never seen her cry like this. He'd seen her cry out of anger, but, this? These tears were from sadness, from fear. It broke him, his heart, it broke for her.
He put his hand on her cheek, wiping away a few tears, "what happened?"
She doesn't pull away from him like she should, "I lost control. I-I could have hurt them Steve, I-I..."
She choked on her words.
"Shh, calm down," he whispers, "breathe Phina."
She took a deep breathe through her nose and let it out through her mouth, "Will, he was, I don't even know. He was having an episode, I touched him and I was transported to the upside down."
Steve's eyes shone with worry, "what?"
She shook her head, "not completely. My body was still here, but, it was like my soul was there. He was there too, he was being attacked by this, this thing. I wanted to save him, I used my fire, but when I came back..."
She goes quiet and Steve nods, "what happened?"
"I was alone, in a circle of destruction." She looked down again. "They were scared of me."
She lifts her hands between them, they still shook with fear, "I'm scared of me."
   Steve took her hands in his, the calming warmth of them engulfed her. They both looked down at their entwined hands.
   "I could have hurt them Steve," she whispers.
   "Yeah, you could have," he whispers back, "but you wouldn't."
   "You don't know that," she argues.
   He looks up at her, his gaze heavy on her face. She lifts her eyes to meet his.
   "Phina, I have never met anyone so protective of her friends and family that she was willing to sacrifice anything and everything to save them," he says, "you would never hurt them Phina, because, even when you're not in control, there will always be a part of you that will look out for them, because, you are incapable of letting someone go unprotected."
   A small, involuntary smile lit her face. He was right, the direct line of where her circle of destruction suggests that she had made a barrier around herself, to do what she does best, protect the ones she loves.
   Yet the smile falls again, "they were scared of me Steve."
   He sighs, "it's because they don't understand, we tend to fear the things we cannot control. And no one, no one, can control you Phina, forgive the soul who tries."
   She looks deeply into his eyes, "are you scared of me Steve?"
   He chuckles lightly, shaking his head, "no. Not at all. I may not completely understand you, not able to get past your walls, but I know that you would never hurt me, at least I would hope so."
   She chuckles as well, "you're right."
   Phina knew that he was absolutely right, she couldn't hurt him. She remembers last year, when she had punched him for insulting Jon and Nancy, she remembers the awful feeling it gave her. She knew now why it had left her in such a bad place, she did, not that she would ever admit it.
   He slowly guides her inside, away from the cold, their hands still connected. The tears had finally stopped, yet her eyes, bloodshot and swollen, remained as tribute to the fallen tears.
   His parents were supposed to come home sometime late tonight, and he didn't want them to come home to find a girl in his living room. His parents weren't unused to random girls at their house, he had brought many here before Nancy. Yet, he didn't want them to see Phina as just another girl he brought home, just another hookup. His parents were judgmental people, and once you've been labled something by them, they were incapable of seeing you differently. Which, unfortunately, meant that Nancy was labled as a hookup girl.
   So he lead her upstairs, to his room. When they get there, he sits her down on his bed.
"Did you drive here," he asks.
Phina nods slowly, "yeah. Probably not the best of decisions to drive in the state I was in."
Steve let's out a breathy laugh, "yeah, no it wasn't. If I remember correctly you wouldn't let me drive in that same condition."
"Well, what can I say," she shrugs, "I'm a bit of a hypocrite."
He stands in the middle of his room, awkwardly as if he didn't know what to do with himself. Phina noticed, and the anxiety of being here hit her again.
"You know what." She suddenly stood up. "I'm sorry, I really shouldn't have come here, you probably had plans, I-I'll go.."
Phina rushes towards the door and Steve holds out his hand, "no no, it's fine. Phina."
She doesn't stop, "no I'm sorry, I don't want to be a burden."
He grabs her arm, pulling her back towards him, "Phina, you're not a burden. I.."
She whirls around, "no Steve I..."
They both stop short. Steve had pulled her closer to him than he had thought, as they only stood mere inches apart. Her hand on his chest, to steady herself from spinning around.
He was so close to her, he could see each little freckle that ran across her nose, from afar, you could only see a few, but here, he could see them all. They looked like a galaxy had been painted on her, thousands of stars and constellations delicately placed one by one. Her hand rested on his chest, and he felt as if she could steal his heart right then and there.
She could feel his breath on her lips, warm, inviting. His hand still rested on her arm, sending a shock of warmth through her. His eyes look into hers, searching for a door to pass through her walls. He was close, to passing the first wall, the door just ahead of him. The more she was captivated by the warm chocolate brown of his eyes, the closer he came.
"Phina," he whispers, almost to quiet for her ears to catch.
And he had broken that first wall. The way he said her name, like a pray to any god he could think of, it shattered that wall. Yet, there were more. And that next wall was named Nancy.
Though Phina knew Nancy's heart had been captured by Jonathan, she knew that Nancy had truly loved Steve. What kind of sister would she be if she let this continue on, whatever this was.
Steve could see her closing up, watched her inner struggle take hold, as it always did. His hand involuntarily moved up her arm, to her shoulder, to her neck, to her cheek. He memorized the feel of her beneath his hand, because he knew she would close him out again.
"Steve," she breathed.
He broke. Any reason he could think of to stop this in its tracks, left him. Nancy left him. His thumb ran absently across her cheekbone, leaving a blissful trail of warmth.
And she came to her senses, "I can't do this to her."
He knew who she meant, no name had to be mentioned. He knew that she would always come first in Phina's mind, no matter what.
"I know," he sighed, her he made no move to let her go.
Her other hand, the one not resting above his heart, came up to cover his hand on her cheek. She gently, heartbreakingly so, pried his hand off. The coldness that came, broke both of them. She guided his hand down to his side, and letting go. His heart shudders beneath her palm. Her own answers.
"Goodnight Steve," she whispered.
Her hand fell from his chest, back to her side. And, like he always did, he watched her walk away from him. Watched till he no longer could. Till the sound of her footsteps faded away. Till the sound of her bike driving away was to faint to hear.
"Goodnight Seraphina."

-1766 words-
I'm so sorry, that was to adorable not to write. The feels. I was thinking about their ship name, y'all have any ideas cause all I've got is Stina and that's kinda stupid. Let me know.
-Morgan