Death of humanity

4

AZELL

I know I've been mean to Lazarius. I haven't been fair to him at all, but sometimes it's difficult to ignore the fact that he's weak. One of the gods that should have the most power, and yet he has the least!

That isn't an excuse, though. We've never agreed on anything. We can hardly stand in a room alone without ending up in some sort of battle that I always win.

I think, one day, Lazarius and I will end up fighting. If we do, I'm not sure what I'll do. He's my brother - I don't hate him. We just disagree a lot, and our arguments tend to get quite heated. I've always been stronger, and when I was younger... I used it to my advantage. I shouldn't have, but I can't change the past. I do regret it though.

My party is going well, despite the fact that Nifteus isn't here. I told him about it, and I'll admit that I did know he was reluctant, but I thought he would come anyway. Obviously I was wrong. I'm not offended - I've had plenty gods ditch my parties - but I have the grace to feel a bit ruffled.

"Azell!" I hear Kione's voice, and I turn. She's waving at me from the drinks table, holding a glass of a pink bubbly substance in her hand. She's wearing a purple dress that clings close to her body, which is very pretty. I make my way over to her, smiling, and I take her hand. My queen is truly a beautiful spectacle.

Not just beautiful, but smart, too. Kione never liked Lazarius, and I think she changed my opinion of him a little. I don't like to think about that possibility, but it's there, unaddressed. I intend to keep it that way.

"You look so lonely, dear," she says, and she looks worried, her blonde eyebrows turned down and her blue eyes wide. "What's wrong?"

"I'm thinking about Lazarius," I admit, even though I know she won't like it. She won't want to talk about him right now.

Kione jerks back as predicted, looking stung. "You don't need to think about him now," she says quickly, as if she's worried. She flicks one hand in dismissal, but her fingers shake as her hand stills. "This is a party, Azell!"

"I know," I say, and I look at the entrance doors as if I expect my brother to burst through them right now like he did earlier at the pantheon. He doesn't, obviously - Lazarius has always avoided parties as if his life depended on it. "But I'm worried about him."

Kione frowns, confused. "Worried?" She echoes me, her nose crinkling like it always does when she's confused. It's cute.

"Yes, worried," I say, and I take her shaking hand and smooth my thumb across her palm. We stand shoulder to shoulder, hers a considerable amount lower than mine, gazing across the guests that are dancing in the empty pantheon while music blares and lights blink across white marble.

"Why would you be worried?" Kione asks me, eyes wide and innocent. But I know her too well - she doesn't like Lazarius, and she hates talking about him. I know it and she knows I know, but still she tries to hide it.

"He's hiding things," I reply, and I get her attention at that. "I know he is. He's my brother, and he shouldn't hide things from me," I snap, my grip tightening on her hand. She doesn't tell me, and I realise and loosen it after a few seconds. "He's trying to, though. But I don't know what it is that he's hiding, and that confuses me."

Kione frowns at me. I've gotten her genuine attention now. "He always tells you things."

"I know," I reply, sighing. "We've grown distant as of late, and I don't like that. But he's hiding something important now. He always used to lie and keep things secret when we were younger, so I learnt how to pry them out of him. But now... we've grown so far apart that I can't tell what he's thinking at all."

Kione lets her hands travel up my arm until she's gripping my bicep, and she leans into me. Her hair smells like jasmine and lavender, like always. "Maybe you should talk to him if it worries you so much. I'm sure he'd talk to you if you were kind."

That's true. If only I'd been kinder... maybe Lazarius wouldn't hide things from me. He's always been so confusing, hiding things and keeping secrets, not telling them to anyone... maybe if I'd been kinder to him he would have told me more, maybe trusted me enough to tell me some of his secrets. What kind of things does he keep inside?

"You don't understand, Kione," I say, rubbing my face with one hand, sighing again. "He's so difficult. I can't get him to speak to me freely, let alone tell me his burning secrets. Sometimes I feel like I don't want him to, because I know he won't be comfortable with other gods knowing."

"But you wouldn't tell anyone," Kione protests, looking surprised. "Does he think you would?"

I shake my head. "As far as Lazarius is concerned, I'm included under the term 'other gods'," I explain, then tap her nose with one finger, smiling. "Ok, I'm sorry. I'll stop being so sombre and enjoy the night," I manage a laugh. Tonight is a party, my party, and I should be enjoying myself, not stressing about my brother. I probably don't even need to.

Kione smiles and stands on the tip of her heels to give me a peck on the cheek, which makes me laugh. "Alright, Azell. Let's dance."

As I lead her towards the dance floor after she puts her drink down, I have only one thought running through my mind. It won't leave me. What if Lazarius and I have to fight?

If we do, I swear by my immortal life that I will win.