atelophobia | justin huang

two

i was right.

he is new.

his name is justin huang, and he's 'luckily' in my first period.

i can already see zhengting whispering in his ear. telling him about me, the school's loser. i see justin glance questioning over at me, and i turn away. i don't need to see his disgusted glares on top of everyone else too.

zhengting's already accepted him into his little posse. and that means good news for justin. because, whether i like it or not, zhengting is basically the king of this school. no one dares disobey him. and everyone looks up to him.

to be accepted by him is literally, an honor. but it's a dangerous place. because everyone else wants your spot, too. and you can lose it at any time. 

justin is lucky. zhengting doesn't like many people.

the teacher's sharp voice jolts me back into reality, and i wince guiltily. i'm not supposed to think about this whole school hierarchy thing. it shouldn't matter.

what happens to justin and zhengting doesn't concern me. 

i force myself to turn my thoughts to something else. 

but, i'm wrong.

it does matter.

what happens to you on day one follows you the rest of your time at this school.

no one wants to be a nobody.

but they don't know. they don't understand.

the price of popularity is huge. there's so many sacrifices you have to make to get to the top. so many people to betray. so many choices. and so many wrong answers. 

but everyone, at some point, longs to be one of the top. to be surrounded by people, to be looked up to. 

school ends in a haze, and i trudge out the gates and begin walking home.

a voice interrupts my thoughts.

"hey! wait!"

there's no way they're talking to me. who would care about me?

i keep walking.

the voice gets louder.

"hey! xuefeng, that's your name right? wait for me!"

it's justin.

i brace myself for whatever's about happen.

a hundred possibilities fly through my head.

zhengting probably sent him. he's going to dump water on my head. steal my homework. kick mud on me. shove me into a hole and laugh at me.

"can i walk home with you?"

huh?