-shattered pieces-

-my dear sunlight-

Take a look at her. Tell me what you see. Do you see the broken girl? the pieces of shattered hopes and decimated trust surrounding her unmoving shards? The brightness of her smiles when she's around you is how desperately she cries for aid at night.

You don't know her. You don't know me. Anytime i can go off and harm those too close to me. I may look happy and laid-back. But that's only because I've stopped caring. For so long now.

There's this boy in my class. And i think i like him. Maybe not as a crush but an admiration. i admire how he always has this affable personality, his smile that melts every sensible girl around. I admire the way he makes people laugh without trying and how he just seems so trustworthy. Someone you wouldn't think twice of sharing a secret.

And for a despondent girl like me, he seemed a ray of sunlight in the chasm of my unhappiness.

I need him. I need him to stay and try to give me hope that hope is still existent.

But i know,

I could never love him. At least not in the way that he deserves. I am not worthy of him. He deserves someone who will compliment his patina. Someone who isn't as broken as i am, who isn't as parlous as i am.

Maybe he's met that person. Maybe he's happier now. And maybe that's why I'm writing this. To finally express what I've long hidden and finally let go and find another.

I'm happier now. For the fact that I've met you. But I know our story won't end with us together. Although, it may end as both of us happy. And for me, that's much more than enough.

Goodbye, my dear sunlight.

Thank you for the luminance you've given and left me with.