poems XXXIV

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My mind floods with lyrics from the songs that we made
And my heart soars with memories of the exact shape and shade
Of your soul, all brought back because we locked gazes

The moon split in half
And the stars crumbled
Falling like fireworks
Into the black seas

I feel nothing
When i pick up that blade
It's a habit
An addiction
You text me
Saying how much
You love me
And that if anything
Happened
That you would die too.
slower than me, maybe
But surely.
As i read your message
I start to feel again
And i know that you mean
What i'm reading
So i drop the blade
Right there
On the floor
As i begin to cry
and i crumble
And i don't even
have the energy
To pick myself up
Let alone the blade
Because sad pain
Is messy
And numb pain
Is exhilarating

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