Hit For The Cycle

13

"Taegan breath, look at me pretty girl breath." Dansby was kneeled in front of me cupping my cheeks trying to get me to regain my composure.

"Mommy?" Kinsley cried from the door. Dansby's head snapped to the door.

"Hey Mommy is ok, why don't you go play with the Munson and Bentley?" He tried to get her out of the room.

"But-" Her bottom lip quivered as she watched my chest heave as I tried to catch my breath.

I was trying so hard to regain my composure but I couldn't. "Kinsley please baby just go in the living room." Dansby's voice was stern making Kinsley nod.

"What's wrong Taegan." He says placing his hands on my knees.

"J-john he, he..." I tried to get out.

"He what Tae? He's in jail." Dansby was confused by my words.

"He's dead." I finally got out. I knew that wasn't what Dansby was expecting when his eyes widened.

"How?" He asked quietly.

"He hung himself. Dans he left a note. He blamed me." I cried letting Dansby wrap his arms me. "He killed himself because of me Dansby."

"Hey look at me." He whispers pulling away and taking my face in his hands. "This is not your fault. I don't need you putting this stress on yourself it's not good for you or the baby." He says before pulling me closer again.

My hand absentmindedly floated down to my flat stomach where it rested. Dansby was right, I needed to calm down. Closing my eyes I try and focus my breath on his heartbeat and bring my panic attack to an end. The tightening in my chest slowly began to loosen and I was able to regain my breath. "There you go pretty girl, keep breathing." Dansby coaches me through it.

Once I calmed down Dansby held me as we laid in bed. "I'm going to go check on Kinsley and put her to bed, are you ok?" He asks softly kissing my head.

I don't answer I just nod. So many thoughts were running through my head right now. The main one being, why? Why would John do this and blame me? I was the one on the wrong side of the relationship not him.

"Hey." I look up to the soft voice. "Someone wanted to come say good night." Dansby set Kinsley on the bed who crawled up to me and cuddled into my chest. "Night night." She whispers nuzzling into me.

"Night sweet girl." I sniffle trying to hide my tears.

"Why sad?" She questions, her little hands coming up to my cheeks. "No cry."

I let out a small laugh as I kiss her head. "Mommy just got some bad news."

"Pup pup make it better?" She asks holding out her stuffed puppy to me making my heart melt.

Knowing she would be persistent I nod taking the dog into my hands. "Thank you baby."

"I love you mommy." She says hugging me before letting out a yawn.

I look up behind her to see Dansby leaning in the door way with a smile. "I love you too, but I think it's time someone goes to bed." I say brushing her hair back from her face.

"Can I sweep in here?" Her bottom lip poked out almost making me cave.

"Sorry princess, mommy and daddy need to talk. But tomorrow night you can I promise." Dansby says scooping her up in his arms.

"Ok." She mumbles sadly as he carries her out.

I knew I had about 20 minutes until Dansby would be back because it takes that long to put Kinsley to bed. I took this time to think, how do I want to handle this situation. When I came to a conclusion I knew Dansby was not going to be happy with it but it needed to be done.