at that point in time, i had no point in life. no happiness. no smiles. no anything.
i screamed. i screamed and i screamed. i wanted everyone to hear my suffering. my pain. my lacking of happiness and joy.
dan and phil rushes into the door, their jaws dropping. i held my arms over my head, screaming and sobbing.
phil ran to my side, holding me in comfort. "there's no p-p-point anymore!" i screamed. "w-why?!"
"shh, (name), shh." phil whispered in my ear. "why, why? why why why why why why!" i repeated, starting to hyperventilate. dan had tears in his eyes as well. no one had seen me like this. not even myself.
"d-deep breaths, (name)!" dan cried. "deep breaths!"
phil's eyes welled up too. it was a never ending cycle of sobs and chokes. "i can't do this. i-i can't do this." i chanted. "yes you can, (name)! yes you can!" dan sobbed. "we all can."
we all lay on the floor, calming down after a while. i finally stood up, grabbing the note next to her lifeless body.
i'm sorry.
i'm so very sorry.
i know this is selfish, illegal and wrong. i know i've caused pain, i know i could've gotten help for it, but i couldn't muster the courage up to even sit up in bed. i love every one of my children, and hope they all stay safe. (name), you can live with dan. as for my other babies, they will be staying with amy. i know she'll take very good care of them and love them like their own.
yours truly,
(mom's name) (last name)
i love you all.
"m-mom.." i whispered, hugging the note. dan had called the cops 10 minutes ago and they were here finally. i sat next to my now dead mother, crying. "everything's going to be okay." i whispered. "everything will be okay."
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it's been a year. phil and i are happily in love, dan and antoine are together, mark and sean broke up, and i somewhat got over my mom. i still cry myself to sleep every once in a while, but i've let it go and i've never been better. phil always ends our texts with "i'll love you forever".
i live with dan, now. just like you told me to. we brought all of my stuff from the old house over to dan's place. amy put the house up for market. the kids really miss you. so do i. but like you said, amy will treat them as her own.
i don't take antidepressants anymore. i've gotten therapy (where dan and phil dragged me in) and i feel healthy and well again. i wish you could see how great my grades have gotten.
i found an old box of photos of you and dad. your wedding pictures, some of dad piloting a jet, and a couple pictures of grandma.
dan really misses you, too. especially dad, since he was like the father he never had.
i just wrote this to check up on you. see how you've been. i wanted to update you on all the new things in my life.
anyways, dan says i should get some sleep. it's 3:00 in the morning. one thing is, i never actually get to sleep anymore. but i'm fine.
dan got me a dog, too. i named him after phil. his name is philip. but we call him phil for short. he's about 5 months old now. he's a golden retriever. i love him to death, and sometimes i feel like he has dad's spirit. like he was reincarnated as the dog. maybe, dan could get me a cat. you always wanted to be reincarnated as a cat. maybe i'll get you.
okay, now dan really wants me to sleep. i love you, and always will. i miss you a lot.
your daughter,
(signature).
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this is so depressing i'm sorry i didn't know how to continue the story enjoy. also i ended this at 666 words ;)
