Samurai Love Ballad Party: A Series of Short Stories

Crazy Kind of Love: The Next Meeting Pt.2

Tokugawa Ieyasu X MC
Rating: G

Including: Lord Tadatsugu, Lord Tadakatsu, Lord Yasumasa

Just as I'm pouring tea, a very large shadow loomed over us. "Could it be? Lord Ieyasu is in a date?"

CRACK!

The owner of the shadow was sent flying away from us, his large form sprawled on the ground. But, he didn't look hurt at all. He looked... happy?

"Ah, how cruel his hand is to me~ Strike me again!"

"You disgusting imbecile, don't speak to me in any way in public. Or private, for that matter." Lord Ieyasu was clearly upset by this sudden visit as he stood there glaring at the man on the ground. .

"Ah, I see you're taking good care of his lordship again," came a gentler, wiser sounding voice. Lord Tadatsugu stood next to me, a gentle smile on his face as he gazed over everything that transpired and then the tray of food. "Looks like a feast here." He chuckled lightly as we watched the larger man get up.

"You're such a deviant," Lord Yasumasa sneered as the other dusted himself off like nothing happened.

"You have to embrace the beauty within the pain. Otherwise, you can never truly appreciate the life you live on the battlefield." His smile was warm and joyous for someone that just got floored. His cheek was a bright red and it made me frown with concern.

"Don't worry," Lord Tadatsugu assured me, "Lord Tadakatsu is quite used to it and can handle such things."

I gripped the teapot as if it could keep me grounded in all this madness.

"Don't tell me you're actually wasting time again on this wench." Lord Yasumasa turned his sneer at me and it was times like this I wish I could take this teapot and whack him with it. Instead, I try to sneer back.

"My business is my own, Yasumasa. Surely you'd do well with a play thing or two." Lord Ieyasu smiled as he teased the retainer.

"I have to agree," said Lord Tadakatsu, "though, if you could find one as cute as the one Lord Ieyasu has now, and that could tolerate you, it might make you less you."

It's like a circus of some kind only I'm both the audience and the main attraction. The angry lord was now arguing with the larger lord as Lord Ieyasu seemed annoyed but sat back down and turned his sneer at Lord Tadatsugu. "Judging the food before me or are you thinking I'll get fat, old man?"

Lord Tadatsugu merely kept smiling and chuckled a bit. "On the contrary, milord. I think all this looks like a very healthy meal for you to become nourished and rule as our lord."

"Are you saying I'm not capable as I am now? How about I pluck what's left on that dome of yours?" Oh no, Lord Tadatsugu is in danger of becoming balder because of me!

But what I expected to be fear on the older retainer's visage, was the continuing smile on his face. What is this... "Of course you are. But, all great men require good food and I think this is another point on this young lady's resumé as possible new cook?"

Eh?! I can feel my eyes grow wide with... I dunno what this is. Shock? Surprise? Dumbfoundedness? Last one sounds good... I must have my mouth gaping open as I look between the two lords because food was shoved into it by the head lord himself. "Now, let's see if it's poisoned this time." He grinned jovially as I'm flailing and half choking on food.

"Ack! Cough! Cough!" I'm not about to spit food out to make it look like something is wrong. Lord Yasumasa is watching probably in hopes that I do die. Lords Tadatsugu and Tadakatsu are patting me on the back and pouring me tea in the hopes it helps.

"Honestly, Lord Ieyasu, if you want to go choking people to death, I'm the better person to do that to." Lord Tadakatsu sounded half disappointedly as he patted me on the back and held the tea I took gratefully. "Here, sip slowly..."

Lord Tadatsugu clucked his tongue as he, too, was patting my back for a moment. "You really need to work on being more delicate with the softer gender, milord. What if we decide to offer her a job as your cook? We have to find a replacement for the one you chased off."

At that, Lord Ieyasu glared at them. I managed to get the food down and drink some tea to wash it all down. "That fool thought he could make outrageous combinations and think it would taste good? Fusion food should be left for the fools of the West."

Silence passed for a moment until a very loud growling was heard. Turning to the source, Lord Ieyasu's cheeks turned a little pink. "Keep staring and I'll take these chopsticks to your eyeballs." Taking the bamboo utensils up, it quickly took a dumpling and ate it while avoiding eye contact. "She's obviously not dead still so I'm obligated to eat since you all wasted enough of my time..." More stomach noises and he turned more pink. You could feel the mood change as we couldn't turn our gazes away. I was expecting more threats, but he was too busy eating.

I move to get up. "I'll just go ge-"

"Sit down." Did Lord Ieyasu just talk with food in his mouth. I actually was looking away when I got up but now I see he really was. I'd verbally say "well, if wonders don't cease to amaze" if I wanted to get struck down, but I don't so I did what I was told.

"Here, I'll get it!" Lord Tadakatsu took the pot from my hands, clearly seeing the bandage on my reddened hand. With a wide grin, he was off before I could object, boasting his way to see how great our small kitchen was.

"Ugh, that bumbling oaf," Lord Yasumasa grumbled as he stormed off after him. "Stop making a mockery of us all!" Their bickering could be heard inside. Oh, my poor parents...

A scowl could be felt from the dining lord as I sat opposite him. However, when I turned to look, practically all the dishes were void of their contents. Lord Tadatsugu saw and smiled like a proud papa. "My, it's good to see your appetite has returned, milord."

Lord Ieyasu wiped his mouth with his napkin and frowned. "As if I would continue to eat those monstrosity to the culinary palette. He should be so lucky that I let him run with his tail between his legs, that mutt."

I felt the blood drain from my face hearing this. And Lord Tadatsugu is wanting me to become the new cook? I so feel like a deer trapped somewhere between a wild hungry bear and a sharp eyed hunter. Lord Ieyasu chuckled as he looked at me. "My goodness, did I spook the little mouse frozen?"

Of course he was going to gode me on. I growled without thinking and that only made him laugh. "Oh, that's right. The mouse has a bit of a backbone." Standing, he stretched like the satisfied feline that he was this day and smiled at me with a look of knowing. What was going on in that damn head of his... "If you really want to try and be my cook, go ahead. Otherwise, Tadatsugu, stop filling her head with useless ideas. She has enough muck in there I'm sure."

Dropping a pouch on the table, the clink of coin was heard from it. Lord Tadatsugu, once again, leaves a hefty payment. "I will see to Lords Tadakatsu and Yasumasa. They seem to be taking some time..." Worry wrinkled his brow as he turned only to be greeted with a loud din.

"This food is great! The spiciness is truly a feat to behold!"

"Will you stop stuffing your face so we came leave? I'm tired of being the center of your attention, you giant bottomless pit."

As if like a smooth operator, Lord Tadatsugu walked in and wrangled the other lords, shooing them out and leaving more money behind. My parents and I were going to object to the money, but Lord Tadatsugu would have none of it. In a low tone, he said to me "Lord Yasumasa won't admit it, but he did enjoy a few dumplings made by your mother. We are truly grateful and would appreciate it if you do consider the offer. Talk it over with your family. I will make sure your family business is as it always was."

And with that, peace fell upon the land and everyone was asking me if Lord Ieyasu was trying to court me. Oh yeah, right, suuuuuuuure. But, a girl can dream right? I shook my head and shooed everyone away from me as I took the dishes in and began washing them. A job working for Lord Ieyasu? A death in paradise if paradise came with lots of sharp pointy poisonous things. I sighed. Lord Tadatsugu seemed sincere about it. Maybe I could consider it. I lose myself in dishes and thoughts as the rest of the day goes by like a blur.