KETCHUP~ SansxReader-Chan (DISCONTINUING)

Chapter One: Regret

Y/N's POV
April 27th, 20XX
A shiver scrambled down my spine. My vision blurry, images flash before me.

"What are you doing, kid?!"
"HUMAN, PLEASE! NYEH! I CAN'T HOLD THEM OFF MUCH LONGER!"
"Go on, punk! Get out of here! I don't care where, just go! Go back to where you came from."
"You're nothing but a disappointment."
"What the heck is wrong with you?!"
"Useless, that's what you are, useless. You can't even do a simple task as this!"
"How dare you suggest otherwise. How dare you suggest that there is another way. HOW DARE YOU."
"Kid, listen up! They're NOT going to spare you as you have them. Somehow, it doesn't work both ways."
"Y-y/N, we have to e-evacuate, a-and we need to do it n-now!"

Voices murmur inside me. No, not inside my head or imagination, but directly inside my innermost being.
Feelings radiate from these... memories, I suppose they are.
Feelings of disappointment.
Feelings of rejection.
Feelings of lost love.
And I don't mean LOVE, LV. No oh no.
I mean love, compassion, attraction, the need to protect, the putting before oneself.
All of it. Lost, gone. And whose fault was it? Mine. It was my fault. I failed my only friends-- no, the only family I ever had. I failed to protect them. Even with my DETERMINATION, I failed. And miserably, one might add.
Why? Why was I so useless as I couldn't do one simple thing? Why? Why did I hesitate? I knew the world, well, humans in general, were evil. They were born corrupted, as was I.
The soft chanting from even my earliest memories taunted me.
"... Give us mercy!"
"Spare us! Give us mercy! Spare us! Give us mercy! Spare us! Give us mercy!"
...I had been foolish, no stupid enough to listen to the humans, even to this day.

I was the one who gave them mercy.

I was the one who spared them.
Now, even now, I cannot even live in the pangs of regret...
Do you wish to know why?
No?
Too bad, I'm going to tell you, anyhow.

...

It's because I'm dead.
That's right, I'm dead. It's what I deserve anyhow, after all of that. I guess I've finally given up.
My DETERMINATION has officially been lost, and it will never be found or recovered. Never. Even if all of this was just a simple nightmare, and none of this was actually within the limits of reality's existence, even then, I would never forgive myself.
Because if this is only a dream, a nightmare, then that means somewhere, once upon a timeline, my horrific dream is actual reality. What a thought. What an idea. Why must every good thing have an alternate terrible thing?
Why must every bad thing have an alternate wonderful thing?
Why must everyone be so miserable, despite their timeline?
Why did those stupid humans seal the monsters underground, anyhow? Out of greed? Fear? Or just plain pleasure of torturing a peaceful race? If you really think about it, ironically enough, you can only guess who the real monsters are here.
If you didn't notice, it's the "humans".
How miserable yet pathetic, no?
There's one thing I would like to state before this entry ends.
What is that you ask? What a curious child.
"One must be weak before he is able to become strong".
(A/N: lol I came up with that lol)
Signed,
Y/N L/N