Drawing the Line

Chapter 6: Love is Patient.....

A/N: Thanks for coming back to read some more! Please know that I have never had to deal with any kind of spinal trauma, so I am not an expert and will likely get things wrong. Apologies in advance! Secondly, please be assured that I do NOT mean to paint physical limitations in a negative light – I am simply writing what I think Jamie's reaction would be in this situation. And thanks to my True North, Miss Robin – always.

For the next week, they kept Jamie fairly sedated in order to restrict his movement and allow his spine time to relax and heal. His orthopedic surgeon checked on him at least three times a day and always checked his feet and legs for any sign of feeling. So far, there was none. Luckily, Jamie was too groggy to pay much attention or worry about what that might mean.

Between me, Jerrie, Jim, Samina, and Cillian, we ensured he was never alone. Someone was always by his side. Whenever he woke, he would immediately look for me or call for me, so I never left his room. I held his hand, read to him, and stroked my fingers through his hair so much it's a wonder he's not bald by now. Jerrie brought me clean clothes every day and sat with Jamie while I took a shower in his en suite bathroom. She encouraged me to go down to the fitness center in the hospital to exercise, but I wasn't ready to leave him even for an hour. I did get her to bring me a yoga mat so I could at least stretch and focus.

I existed on hospital food and whatever Jerrie or Jim brought in for me. That was fine by me because I didn't have much of an appetite. Whenever he was awake, he would urge me to lay with him and everyone got used to seeing me cuddled up next to him, stroking his arms and his strong jaw. Once and only once did a nurse try to chase me out of the bed, but the doctor stopped her. "Whatever isn't hurting him is helping him and he is more restful with her close. Leave her alone and put it in the chart so the other nurses know." I like this doctor more every day.

With each day, he stayed awake more and more and at the start of the second week he was starting to pay more attention to the doctor and what was happening around him. "Why can't I feel that?" He frowned as the doctor ran his pen up the arch of his foot, which is normally ticklish as hell.

The doctor shrugged, "Spinal injuries are tricky, Jamie. Sometimes it just takes time for things to settle down after a trauma like you sustained. I haven't wanted to move you any more than necessary, but I think tomorrow we'll send you down for an MRI and see what that can tell us."

"But the feeling will come back eventually, right?"

And so began the talk I was dreading. I sat on the bed by Jamie and held his hand as the doctor pulled a chair close and explained to him what he is facing. "Jamie, you are an incredibly strong and healthy man, which is the only reason you aren't in worse shape after the severe trauma you sustained. I'll be honest and tell you that there is a 50/50 chance that you severed the nerves in your lower spine. If you did, the feeling will not come back."

"But you can do some kind of surgery to repair them, right?"

The doctor looks at him and simply shakes his head. Jamie tenses and grips my hand, "Bedpan, I'm gonna be sick." I leap for the bedpan and get it to him just in time.

The doctor presses the button for a nurse to come in. She arrives right as he finishes and takes the bedpan. I go to the bathroom for a wet cloth and bathe his face. "Sweetheart listen to him. There's only a 50% chance that is the case, which means there is just as much chance that you will make a full recovery."

He pushes my hand away from his face and looks at the doctor. "And if I don't? What does that mean?"

The doctor answers in a no nonsense manner. "That means you would live the rest of your life with the assistance of a wheelchair. We'll put you through therapy so that you are self-sufficient. With your upper body strength, you'll manage much better than most and be quite fine."