PERFECT ➣ JINCENTRIC✓

𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓'𝐒 𝐎𝐊

Jung Hoseok

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I, Jung Hoseok love Kim Seokjin and want to keep him beside me as long as possible, even if we're just friends.

Jin is one person I would say has had the biggest impact on my life, he's a wonderful person and would go to some extreme lengths just to make sure someone is happy.

Jin and I met through his younger brother, Taehyung. At that time I wasn't as close with Jin like everyone else. I had too much going on to be around him or the group.

I was just so unmotivated and miserable, I honestly didn't see a point being around them, I started to drift away from everyone and kept to myself. I was later diagnosed with depression, it was hard for me to come to terms with but it explained why I was feeling the way I was.

I refused to take antidepressants or go back to a therapist saying that I was fine and I didn't need help not knowing it could have gotten worse. I was more afraid of what others would have thought about me and if my friends would still be there.

I told no one else knew besides my parents and as things were spiraling out of control for me I didn't know what to do. I started cutting to help cope, thinking that anyone would care or even notice. One day my sleeve slipped up and Jin just so happened to see the cuts on my wrist. I expected him to ignore it and pretended like he never saw anything but instead, he pulled me to the side talking to me asking what happened.

I tried to lie but Jin wasn't falling for my bullshit so I told him the truth. That I had depression and never told anyone. Instead of getting mad at me he hugged me and told me that everything would be okay. Jin talked to my parents about taking me to a therapist. After that I hated him thinking that he betrayed me when all he did was try to help.

I was stubborn at the time and still ignored him even though therapy was going well for me. Just when things were getting better everything just came crashing back down. One night I decided that I wanted to take my own life, sending all my friend's text messages at 3 am thanking them and saying my goodbyes. Shitty way to do it, but I just wasn't thinking at that time.

That night Jin was the only person to be awake to receive the text message. He called the police, drove to my house, woke up my parents, and managed to get to me just in time.

I've never thought anyone had ever cared about me, I felt as if I was worthless and if I was gone it wouldn't have even mattered. I felt horrible that night and still do thinking I had hurt the people I cared about the most. That night Jin said he would never leave my side and would help me.

After everything that had happened, I went back to therapy and told my friends about what has been going on with me. Jin still stuck around to make sure I was okay, telling me that no matter what our friends and he will always be there.

Of course, there are times when I wonder why he's still with me and that I don't deserve someone like him, but he always makes me feel like I'm worth something. Over time, I started to realize my feelings for Jin. He's so caring, supportive, and listens to me whenever I need it. I love him so much my My feelings have never changed.

Unlike others, I've never told Jin how I actually felt.I admire and love Jin so much, even though he will never be with me at least I know he's still there. And that's perfectly okay with me.

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