chapter 11 » make damn sure

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Ajax's heart was beating fast but her mouth was in a straight line and there were no indications that she was lying

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Ajax's heart was beating fast but her mouth was in a straight line and there were no indications that she was lying. Peter's known every time she's lied but he was hoping that somehow, she learned to avoid tells, control her emotions of guilt. But, that wasn't it and deep down, Peter knew. Her eyes weren't that crystal blue he could fall in love with every day. They were darker, almost midnight blue.

"Why?" Peter asks, no denying it this time.

"Why?" Ajax scoffs, tossing her hands in the air. "Because I shoot fire out of my damn hands that's why! Because for some fucked up reason, that asshole who infected my mom who was just trying to save his life, was still alive. My mom died before he did. In fact, you know he was still pretty fucking healthy all because the medications were working on him and not my fucking mom. So I killed him. Life for a life and he was gonna die anyway."

"Y-you said innocent and yeah I think that guy was innocent but you don't seem to think that."

Ajax looks to the ground and the anger that clouded her eyes vanished in a second. "Yeah," She looks up to Peter. "I ran off, ran off to that abandoned town, well, more like strip of road, thirty miles south. You know, the one that was basically condemned. I set the whole damn place on fire because I don't have a dad. I don't have a mom. My uncle beats the shit out of me when he can and he stole all my money," Peter's brows furrow as Ajax rambles. "Trust fund." She clarifies.

"I've got a scar covering half my fucking torso and I can't tell anyone about it because of how I fucking got it but let me tell you, it doesn't stop the haunting that comes every damn day when I have to shower and I'm supposed to be able to lean on the al-fucking-mighty Tony Stark. Yeah, well, he can help Rhodey walk again but he can't-couldn't fix my mom! HE'S AN INNOVATOR FOR FUCK'S SAKE. He knows Bruce Banner. Dr. Strange, why the fuck couldn't he fix my mom? So, I went nuts for a bit and set a bunch of condemned houses on fire and I didn't know there was a homeless family camping out in one of the houses. Killed them: mom, dad, and their two kids."

Silence.

Ajax stared at Peter, sadness filled her eyes but it was being mixed with almost a taunt. AS if she were only telling Peter as a scare tactic, to get him to be afraid of her. Hell, maybe even just to get him to see they have different morals. Her end goal was to get Peter away from her. To protect him from her, physically and mentally and by the look on his face, it worked.

"You...killed kids?" Peter's voice is like ice cracking over a lake. How could she kill children?

"Yeah." Ajax nods and her eyes are distant.

"Why didn't...why didn't you check the houses? Or...why didn't you-"

"Why didn't I just go home? Why didn't I just do anything else but set something on fire?" Ajax cuts him off and he nods. "Because, I don't care."

It's true, she doesn't. But, it's different. She doesn't care about what happens to her, not about the people she's killed. She has a heart as much as she'd like to think she doesn't. Ajax cares about the people she's killed and if she could take it back, she would but she can't.

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