Patchwork

The Man in the Cairo Overcoat

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Author-sama: delete the part where Lyra and Andesine kiss.

Why not? I wonder as I explore the Starlight Temple. I liked it. True, they're not in love per se, but seriously. Kissing is hilarious. Authors find excuses to make characters all the time. Cut me a little slack!

Author-sama: kill off Andesine

Okay, I'm going to delete this prototype if I hear another peep out of you trying to make me kill off characters. *insert creepy close-up here* I'll do it without you telling me. I love being an author. You can do anything. Unlimited power- you are in control. Now, control is a complete illusion- unless that control happens to be over a semi-fictional world where people fall in love or die with a click of the keyboard. This is why I write! Well, that and because making people happy is pretty fun, too.

I step over a fallen column and send another newly- gotten star arrow to illuminate the darkness ahead. It lights up the corridor and awakens an Acuben hiding in the numerous shadows.

Thus begins another battle, albeit a shorter one. I have just enough time to publish the newest chapter of Lyra's adventures.

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Lyra felt as though she were being ripped in half by Slenderman, but she could still feel herself, and Andesine.

Andesine. Anger flared as she remembered (though she wasn't quite sure that she had forgotten in the first place). He had kissed her. He was kissing her. She could feel his lips on hers, the warmth of his arms around her, the fuzziness of his red-brown sweater. She opened her eyes, and at the same second, they separated.

Lyra found herself rolling like a log down a grassy hill. When she was finally able to stop herself, she sat up and rested for a second, every centimeter of her body aching. She gazed out at the spectacle before her.

Giant walls made of what looked like cobblestone surrounded a building of some sort. Lyra could just make out spires, chocolate brown, peeking out from behind the looming walls. Outside the walls stood Kyanites, hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of them. She whistled softly. There must be something really nice inside.

Andesine popped out of the ground beside her. "Why'd you let go?" He demanded. "I mean, come on, it was just a kiss, it meant nothing-"

"You may not be very familiar with human customs," replied Lyra crossly, "But stealing a girl's first kiss without her permission is very rude. I might even go so far as to say that it is COMPLETELY FREAKING UNFORGIVABLE!" Lyra would have continued, but Andesine clapped a hand over her mouth.

"Do you WANT to die?" He hissed. "Those Kyanites aren't any weaker than the one we faced, and they'll rush us, all at once. And they will kill you. They want to destroy the Player. It's why they exist. So shut the fairuz up and get ready to teleport again."

"There is no way in Tartarus that I'd give you my second kiss after you stole the first."

"Stupid humans! There are a few of my genes in your bloodstream now. It should be enough for you to travel with me. Get on my back," he commanded, bending over.

"No," Lyra replied forcefully. "Let's do this the way friends do it and just link arms."

Andesine rolled his eyes. "Fine. But the pain'll be worse."

Lyra linked arms with him, gritting her teeth in anticipation of the pain. Still, it shocked her. She gripped her guide's arm tighter as they shot through the dark.

After what seemed like an eternity, they resurfaced, popping up just inside the wall.

"Won't there be guards here?" Lyra queried, rubbing her arm.

"Nah. Most of the Earth Hollows don't have that much intelligence." Andesine replied easily. "But best to keep to the shadows," he added.

"So, why do they want me dead?" Lyra whispered as they sneaked through the earthen halls. "Is there some sort of grudge?"

"No. They're just made for death and destruction, that's all," Andesine answered. "The Ancient Ones like that sort of thing. Not the Kyanites' fault, really. They can't help that they were made for killing."

Footsteps began to echo down the corridor.

"It's a boss!" Andesine whispered. He tugged me around a corner just in time. The footsteps grew louder and louder and louder until it walked right past the corridor Lyra and Andesine were hiding down. It was even taller than the Kyanite (which was saying something). Projecting from either end of its mouth were tusks dripping with venom. The whole temple shook with each step.

The creature stopped. Lyra clapped a hand over her own mouth to prevent herself from gasping. Unfortunately, the noise it made had the monster turning towards them before Lyra could say, "Whoops."

"RUN!" Andesine yelled.

"AS IF I NEEDED SOMEONE TO TELL ME!" Lyra yelled, as the two sprinted away from the monster, who, with a roar that made dust fall from the ceiling, immediately gave chase.

Though the duo had a head start, the giant creature had longer legs and quickly began to gain on them. For once, Andesine seemed out of clever things to do.

It was Lyra who spotted the low archway and managed to roll insde, dragging her guide behind her. Lyra sat down, panting.

"We have to keep going," Andesine said urgently. "I know what bosses are like here, and he'll bust down the whole place if it kills you, sacred to Earth Elementals or no."

He was right. The Earth Boss was peering through the tiny opening. A hand reached in, attempting to grab one of them.

Lyra stumbled backwards, turned around, and began to run again.

"I," she panted, "HATE, RUNNING!"

She felt a clod of dirt hit her back as the walls exploded. Before she could turn around to look, Andesine grabbed her hand. "This way!" He yelled, yanking her around a corner.

They seemed to run for forever through the maze of the Earth Temple before Andesine finally told her they were nearly at the heart. Lyra was too tired to ask what was at the heart.

They took half a dozen turns before they ducked into another low archway.

"This temple was designed to give the players a bit of an advantage- low doors and a tall boss, slows it down," Andesine explained as they raced along the hallway.

Does he ever get tired? Lyra wondered, looking at her companion. When all he did was continue to run, she shrugged internally, thinking, he is a rock. Must be impossible.

"Here we are," said rock announced. "The Heart of Earth and Rock."

"THOEAR?" Lyra asked. "Sounds like..."

"THERE IS NOT A BLAZING ACRONYM FOR THE SACRED HEART!!!" Andesine suddenly thundered.

"Okay, then, Mister Mood Swing," Lyra mumbled. "So why are we here? Is it safe?"

"We're here," Andesine replied (more calmly) "for that." He pointed across the room, an impossibly far distance, where something shone in one of the many small beams of light that shone through cracks in the earthen dome.

"Let's go get it, then," Lyra said. "What're we waiting for?"

"Nothing," Andesine replied. "I just thought it was a bit too quiet..."

He was right, Lyra noticed. The (up until now) continual sounds of the Earth Boss had vanished. Lyra's eyes widened. "We need to run," she whispered.

"Yep," Andesine replied.

They had barely moved when the wall exploded.