The Awkward Stories Of Penny Longbottom

My first 8th grade lunch

September 6, 2014

Okay.

What the hell can I say about my first day?

Let's start with my beyond mortifying first lunch of 8th grade.

It seriously is a big deal, it's your first appearance to a huge cafeteria full of the popular, regular, and goth 8th graders.

The cafeteria is split up into six tables, and six groups.

The Goth.

The Almost-populars.

The Populars.

The Bookworms.

The Regulars.

The Nobodys.

On the first day, you can't just sit anywhere! Not because pink isnt the color of your shirt but because its examination time.

The first day of 8th grade lunch shows if you've changed since 6th and 7th grade or if you've been the same unfashionable and clueless person since the beginning.

Perhaps, I could have changed in other's eyes.

Or perhaps, I'm still the nerd I always was with my dirty orange hair along with my old converse hightops.

So I went in line to get my lunch, and I was totally surrounded by tall girls with denim shirts and crop tops.

They were totally checking to see if I had huge breasts, which I didn't.

I didn't get the memo that every 8th grade girl had to go get breats implants.

I had worn a gray v-shirt and denim skinny jeans with NEW converse shoes. Because I like being casual.

But of course, the girls had to see my outfit head to toe so they can gloat about how better they look.

I was then third in line to get lunch. I'm scared.

As I watched the first boy in line try to find a table, he tried sitting at the popular table. Fail. Then he tried to sit at the goth table and he wasn't even goth at all, mega fail.

He sat at 'the Nobodys' table.

Poor boy.

Holy frick! What am I gonna do?

It was second in line.

totally ready, best lunch everr ☒

completely mortified. not ready. ☑

After I gave the lunch-lady five dollars for suckish pizza and possibly expired milk.

I like pizza and milk, deal with it!

Now I'm walking past these tables, hoping that someone will ask me to sut with them.

Then I suddenly I changed my hairstyle from a ponytail to flipping hair side to side to lay it down.

I guess it was attractive to boys because all them were staring at me.

"Hey um, Penny, you can sit with us if you want." Someone said behind me.

I turned around, and it was a really cute boy sitting at the ALMOST-POPULAR TABLE.

I REPEAT I REPEAT

THE ALMOST POPULAR TABLE

"Sure!" I said while giving him a flirtateous grin and I headed to an open seat.

But thats when it got mortifying, life destroying, and social life crushing.

As I walked away, I was not notified about the puddle of orange juice and I slipped over it.

Of course, I suffered a dramatic fall, along with loud scream.

Everyone looked at me, and I couldn't take any more embarrassment than I was already getting so I got up. But little did I know that a ceaser salad was my next victim.

I was looking down as I sprinted away, and crashed into a girl holding her salad.

The salad with the freezing cold ranch dressing was all over my neck and dripping down my freaking shirt!

How's that for the first 8th grade lunch?