The Girl Behind the Light

Chapter Six: The Waiting Days

October 19, 20-

"I know you love me," Ariana said while staring at me passionately.

"Of course, I'd do anything for you, my love." I look back with the same great thirst for love and pleasure.

She walked closer to me, and she leaned towards my face. My vision became colorless, not even black, as I fall back with her hugging my body. Our lips connected, and we became one with the ever infinite scenery.

Then I woke up and realized I had the most guilt-felt dream ever. I couldn't believe I just experienced that. There was no way I loved her, of course not. She is only a friend, and never once did I have any intentions of doing that with her. I, I just...never mind.

I got to school today, and Tori and I had ignored each other this morning. It was so awkward to even pass by each other. It just felt like we weren't connected to each other anymore. Was this the end of us?

"How are you doing?" Ariana asked me during passing period.

"Good," I say just to not let her know I was sad, especially when she became the reason that all of this even happened.

"Did you want to hang out tomorrow? I would today but I have to finish taking a test." Her face seemed more delicate than usual, was she wearing makeup?

"I'll think about it and I'll let you know later." Why do I feel the urge to get closer to her?

"Alright, see you later then." She walks away behind me, and I go to look back at her, forever feeling the guilt, but forever feeling the urge for passion.

"You okay Derek?" Nate could tell I wasn't myself at lunch. It didn't help that it was just us and Carol, and Dillon was off entertaining Tori for us.

"I'm fine, I swear," I say to not worry him.

I know I can fix this problem myself, but I just don't know how yet. I got to think about it more, but for now, I don't feel like writing too much until I do.

...

October 22, 20-

...

"Glad you could join me today," Ariana said after smearing thick glossy lipstick on somewhat thicker lips than I once didn't realize she had.

"It wasn't a problem. Besides, we don't really hang out at school much, all we do is text and say hey during passing period."

"True. Well, normally I'm not used to hanging out with anyone else. I would join Lily sometimes, but we all know what happened there. Since then it's just been me and my headphones." She showed me the headphones she was talking about. They were Base Headphones, one of the nicest mainstream-sold headphones. I would be jealous if I knew anything better than my cheap little earbuds.

"I've never used those before. I'm so used to hearing music through my default headphones I got with my phone."

"Well, there isn't much of a difference. These headphones just have more bass to them, that's why people think they sound good. I've been wanting a pair of Vex Ultra headphones for a while, but it's like $500 and I can't afford it. If I get a pair of those, a quality microphone, and someone who knows how to produce music, maybe I could become a professional singer. It would be a lotta fun, but I don't know if I have what it takes." I've seen her posts on Stream, and I would be blown away if anyone thought she couldn't sing well.