McHanzo Fluff

Sup, Bro?

     By the time Hanzo calmed down enough to breathe normally, Jesse had gone through 3 cups of "hard coffee," a fancy way of saying "whiskey in a mug." Not that Hanzo was doing any better as he sipped his sake quietly. He was feeling a slight buzz now, but it was doing nothing to soothe the anxiety in his gut. His dragons had been entirely unresponsive since their outburst, which he wasn't sure whether to be glad or upset about. His horns-god, his horns- were just in his peripheral vision as he hung his head with worry, and his tail was flickering tensely. Jesse was scarcely any better off, his tail wagging slowly and his ears laid flat against his head. McCree set down his mug with a sigh. "I don't s'pose you want to go tell the doc about this recent development?" Hanzo shook his head morosely. "... Winston? He's a good pal to have with this stuff." Again, Hanzo shook his head. "... How about Genji?" Hanzo nearly dropped his cup on the floor at his brother's name. He stared incredulously at the cowboy. "What?!" He hissed. While it was true that he and his brother were making amends and no longer fighting, he did not feel comfortable with the idea of showing his brother... this. "I'm just saying that maybe his spirit dragon can help us out since yours are on the fritz." Hanzo pinched the bridge of his nose. "That's not how this works, Jesse. The spirits are bonded to their masters. My dragons aid me, my brother's aids him." McCree frowned. "Well, maybe he knows something about this that we don't. Maybe he's seen it, or something like it. Hell, maybe Zenyatta has seen this before. He is a monk, they deal with weird spiritualistic crap all the time, right?" Hanzo scowled. He doubted very much that either of them had ever seen anything like this before. And he did not want Genji to see him like this. He'd never live it down.

The cell phone on Hanzo's desk nearly startled the scales off of him as he fumbled to pick it up. He groaned as he saw the caller ID. Speak of the devil. He raised the phone to his ear, noting with irritation that his ear flicked around it uncomfortably. "Hanzo speaking." "Yo, aniki!" Hanzo jerked the phone away from his ear, Genji's voice far too loud for them. McCree gestured for him to hold it a couple of inches away. Hanzo nodded. "... and you know how that is. So, anyway, what's been going on with you?" Hanzo licked his lips, his mouth going dry, "Not much, other than the occasional mission. How are things in Nepal?" Genji groaned, "Boring as hell. It's beautiful, don't get me wrong, but God, would it kill these people to do something other than sit around in huts all day? Oh well, that's what I get for choosing a diplomatic mission. At least I'll be back at base soon, and can bore you with details in person." Hanzo stiffened. "You're headed back then?" "Yeah, we're on the plane back now. Huh whazzat?" Genji's voice was muffled, "oh, Zen says hi! He wants to remind you not to be so stressed all the time and to please practice your meditation." Hanzo snorted. Fat chance. "Hey, don't diss it till you try it. You might enjoy it if you ever take that stick out of your- OW!" Hanzo chuckled as he pictures Zenyatta "accidentally" lobbing one of his orbs at Genji. Funny, seeing as it happened whenever the cyborg tried to swear. "Jeez, Zen, what happened to being a pacifist? Anyway, we should be back in like 15 minutes, so be sure to tell Tracer to save some tacos for me. Sayonara, loser!" *click* Hanzo lowered his phone with a shuddering breath. McCree looked at him anxiously. "My brother is 15 minutes from base. He'll be here soon." Jesse's eyebrows shot up. "Well, ain't that a kick in the pants. What are you gonna do?" Hanzo stared at his cup intensely as if it would shatter under his gaze. "... I am going to hide from my brother." Jesse sputtered. "Yer gonna what." Hanzo hunkered down, tail twitching. "At least until I can get this under control." Jesse sighed, taking another swing of drink, when there was a knock at the door. "Yo, aniki, I totally didn't lie about how far we were to surprise you! So let me in!" Hanzo stiffened, tail stiff and ears bolt upright. He looked at McCree pleadingly. Jesse simply shrugged helplessly. "U-uh, just a second, Genji. I was not expecting you back this soon and am... indecent." Genji snorted, "Nothing I haven't seen before, but whatever."

Hanzo ran to his bed and yanked the comforter off, draping it over his head and around his body. McCree hammed his hat back on and frantically stuffed his tail into his pants, then inclined his head to the door. Hanzo nodded, swallowing. "Alright, Genji, come on in." Genji opened the door with a shove, striking a pose like a crappy anime character. "Konichiwa, asshole! Oh, hey Jesse... didn't know you were here... in my bro's apartment." Hanzo looked skyward and groaned softly. McCree was entirely unhelpful, standing ramrod straight and trying to look inconspicuous. "It is good to see you, too, brother. Would you like some tea?" Hanzo said softly. Genji didn't answer, he just looked between Jesse and Hanzo. Hanzo sweated nervously. Suddenly, Genji made a small "oh" noise, then yelled loudly, "OH! OOOOH MY GOD, AHAHAHAHA! NO WAY!" Genji doubled over in laughter as Hanzo turned beet red. "Holy shit, bro, you totally did it with McCree. Good for you! Not sure what the blanket's about, but I guess you gotta cover up somehow after... sexy cowboy times." Genji made a motion like he was winking as McCree and Hanzo had a battle over who could blush the reddest. "Now-now wait a minute, Genji, that ain't what-" McCree was cut off by Genji grabbing his arm and pulling him close. "You listen to me, Cowboy, you may be my best friend, but if you break my brother's heart, I swear to God I'll sneak into your room and cut your dick off with my sword, got it?" Jesse gulped nervously and nodded. Hanzo would have been honored by his brother's words if he wasn't so mortified. Genji released McCree's arm, "Good! Glad you understand. Welp, is better go see if Zen needs any help with anything. I'll leave you two to your fun. Have fun, G.A.M.F.!" And with that, Genji slammed the door and cackled down the hall. Hanzo and McCree sat in silence for a few seconds. Jesse cleared his throat, "Well... at least he didn't see your horns?" Hanzo threw a pillow at him.

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HEY! I'M REALLY SORRY THAT IT'S TAKEN ME THIS LONG TO UPDATE GAH. I just got done reading half a fanfic and realizing it wasn't finished and the concentrated guilt I felt knowing I did that to you guys motivated me to finish this chapter. The tone is totally different, huh? Also, I have no idea how Genji really acts, but my guess is he's just a hacking nerd. He's a Japanese Weeaboo, if that makes sense. Also kind of an a$$hole to Hanzo only, because brothers. LET ME K OW WHAT YOU THINK SORRY FOR THE WAIT AAAAAAAAAAAA
       -Ciao! Mitzy