Soulless

3

I vividly remember being a child, and standing in front of the man in front of me now.

I had complained about the day's session in the lab when I was a child. I said I didn't want to do it anymore because it hurt. I said I wanted to be a real girl because I'd seen some on tv. I was standing in front of this tall large man with tears streaming down my face and he crouched down on his knees while I stood in his red office. He held my face in his hands almost like I imagined a father would, and told me that I was just imagining it. I couldn't feel. I was pretending to be a real girl, but he told me I was not.

He closed his office's door and turned his hand on me. That was the day they took my TV privileges and were kind enough to leave on the news. I learned that day that I wasn't allowed to feel. I never cried again.

"Hello, number 203." The silver haired man spoke to me and I wasn't sure what to do. "Please, come have a seat with us."

The Protectors positioned themselves at the double doors behind me, and I cautiously took a seat on the leather couch in front of me. They sat across from me with the table separating our bodies. Katie stood with pursed lips. The atmosphere was so tense I was worried I might explode. Social intricacies were foreign to me.

The Director simply sat with his gaze on me intently, a smug smile stretched across his lips. For a moment I thought his face might be made of plastic it looked so fake. Silence stretched out like a flat horizon.

"I was just watching you on TV." I broke the silence like glass with my jagged voice.

"Of course, the pre- recorded interview." He smiled, and his eyes wrinkled where I'd noticed his faint lines earlier today. It looked like a real smile. "It will probably be replaying for a while. What I said was," he paused and squinted at me in an odd manor, "Controversial."

I nodded in response but didn't know how else to react. He continued.

"Did you catch what else I said? Of course, for this idea of mine to perhaps work, we need to prove it can work." The Director shifted his weight awkwardly and I scrutinized his fake smile. What was he hiding?

"Why am I here?" I asked. I wasn't expecting him to laugh, but a guttural, amused sound came from him. I almost jumped because I hadn't heard a real laugh in what seemed like forever.

"Number 203, you are here because you are the most compliant Shell there is. You are the definition of a Shell. You show no emotion or feeling, and follow your duties every day without arguing. The public will be so curious to know who you are." He leaned forward to put his elbows on his knees and intertwined his fingers. "You're going to be the first Shell which I'm going to introduce to the world."

I suddenly felt short of breath, the wind knocked from my chest. It felt like a someone was clutching my throat and my surprise was holding my tongue. I was compliant so I would live. It was all for survival.

"Now, I see that you do not have a name." He kept going while he studied my probably surprise stricken face. I quickly composed it so my mouth was set in a firm line. "What would you like to be called?"

I looked to the only person that knew me better than anyone else in the room. Katie smiled softly and motioned for me to talk.

"Mireya." I stated, vaguely remembering the name of one of the main characters in a TV show I watched as a child. I remember relating with her, as the outcast in her world.

"Alright, Mireya," I liked how the silver haired man said my name, "We're going to take you out of here. People are going to want to hear your voice, we have requests for interviews from everyone." He smiled warmly. The Director twitched next to him.

I nodded in response, still unused to interacting with a human. The man stood up and the Director stumbled up after him, putting his hands behind his back. It was obvious the power in this room solely belonged to the silver haired man. The man held his hand out to me with a tight smile and I stared at his round face blankly.

"You shake it." Katie reminded me gently.

"Call me Matthew."

I took his hand and he shook it firmly with his warm, strong hand. He had pretty blue eyes.

"Katie will be accompanying you through all of this, as well. So you have some familiarity."

My eyes darted over to Katie and I was glad when she smiled. Her eyes sparkled at me kindly. I felt something strange, something essential that I'd suppressed my whole life. It was a small shred of glee rising up at the thought of being free. I wouldn't be trapped behind these white walls, and I had really never thought of it as a prison until now. This man- Matthew - was giving me a shot at being in the world I was so enthralled by as a child.