The One That Got Away

Do you really believe that there's one person in your life that you let slipped away? This person that you let to get away from your life? Masyado bang matanong? Paikliin na lang natin, kilala mo ba kung sino ang TOTGA mo? In general, your "the one that got away". Kormy noh? Pero tinamaan ka.

I never really believe in those kind of sh*ts until it happened to me. Totoo nga talagang kakainin mo lang lahat ng sasabihin mo kung pangungunahan mo yung mga mangyayari sa future. By the way, my name's Vixen Ramos. A certified playgirl, "dati". Until he came into the picture, Lawrence Herrera, my ultimate suitor way back in high school. He's so persistent on pursuing me even though harap-harapan kong ipinapakita sa kanya na wala siyang mapapala sakin. But he never gave up, he always have something that can amuse every woman he pursues. But that time, I kept on rejecting him. Its not that I don't like him, kasi hello? Sino bang hindi magkaka-gusto sa isang gwapong katulad niya? Actually, he's really my ideal man, and I really, really like him na that time. Pero masisisi niyo ba ko kung bakit hindi ko siya sinagot?

I just realized that time, that I don't deserve him, no body deserves me that time. Kasi nga I'm a playgirl, natatakot akong pasukin ang isang bagay na pinaglalaruan ko lang. Hindi ko alam kung pano magseryoso noon eh, natatakot akong baka masaktan ko lang siya kapag pinilit ko ring sagutin siya. So even though gustong-gusto ko ng madaliin yung paghihirap niya sa pagsuyo sakin, hindi ko magawa. I didn't realized that with those acts I'm showing him, I'm letting him slipped away from me, unknowingly.

4th year college na kami nun nung malaman kong lilipat na sila ng parents niya sa America. I tried to approach him, to talk to him, to finally say "YES" kasi naman, lolokohin ko pa yung sarili ko that time? Eh alam ko namang mahal na mahal ko na siya the first time I saw him. But fear ate me again for god knows how many times already. Instead of talking and approaching him, para akong takot na dagang nagtago sa bahay namin nung time na aalis na siya. And that was the biggest mistake I've ever done in my whole existence in this world.

But not this time! Yes! 5 years had passed after he left. And here I am, still waiting for him. Reunion na ng batch namin nun, I'm so excited and still, nervous of the feelings I never imagined I would feel. Akala ko kasi noon wala na kong pag-asang magseryoso, pero nung nakilala ko siya, doon pumasok sa isip ko na maimagine kaming dalawa na masaya at committed sa isa't isa. I'm so excited to meet everyone that time, especially him.

*Kriiiiiiiing.. Kriiiiiiiing*

"Hello? Janice!" -me

(Oh my gosh Vixen! Are you ready for tonight?! Nabalitaan kong makakapunta daw si Lawrence mamaya! So, are you ready?) -Janice. Sobrang lakas ng excitement niya sa katawan, hahaha.

"Tinatanong pa ba yan? Of course its a major super duper yes! I can't wait to meet him again Ja, after 5 years, makikita ko ulit siya. And hindi ko na palalampasin pa yung pagkakataon na to, Ja. Not this time. Gusto ko ng maranasan ulit yung mga kasweetan at kakornihan niya noon, mapasagot lang ako. At kung kinakailangang ako pa yung manligaw ngayon maibalik ko lang ulit yung dati, gagawin ko. I just can't let go him now Ja, just not this time."

(Aja! Fighting girl! Wag ka ng matakot umamin sa kanya ngayon, aba! Antagal ka niyang sinuyo noon pero binalewala mo lang siya kahit alam mong seryoso siya sayo, habang may nararamdaman ka naman para sa kanya. If you let this moment pass again Xen, I swear ako na mismo ang babatok sa inyong dalawa ni Lawrence. Ang aarte niyo naman kasi! Hahahaha, anyways be ready papunta na ko sa venue, sumunod k na ah?)