Please Don't Take My Sunshine Away

Part 4

One month later. 

Oliver delivered a final blow to the criminal bleeding before him. He had just taken down a group of ten criminals. The Starling City police were on their way, he had to get back to the HQ. Without speaking through the comms to Diggle, he headed back.

When he arrived, Diggle got out of the desk chair with a concerned look on his face. "What the hell happened out there?"

Oliver unzipped the top of his suit and took it off, revealing cuts and bruises and scars. "What do you mean?"

"You stopped answering me after you disabled the bomb. I didn't know what was going on, I couldn't hack the cameras to watch your back. You shouldn't have gone after all those men."

He turned to Diggle, his expression revealing that he didn't care what Diggle was saying. "If I had not gone after the men responsible for setting the bomb, they would have escaped."

"You were outnumbered, they could have beaten you," Digg argued.

"But they didn't," Oliver shot back. "And you don't need to try to hack the cameras again, I understand that not everyone can do that." 

These were the indirect ways he mentioned Felicity. He never said her name, he couldn't. 

Oliver was turning away when Diggle grabbed his arm. "Hey, I know you're hurting. I lost her too. But that doesn't mean you can go around destroying yourself. She wouldn't want that." 

The looked Oliver threw Diggle told him to back off. He let go of Oliver's arm. Oliver turned and stalked out of the room. At his new apartment, he changed into regular clothes. Then he headed to the Starling City Mental Institution. This is where Thea had been residing for the past month. The damage Malcolm had done to her was immense. 

Oliver entered the stark white room with no pictures, a single bed, and a nightstand and small desk. Thea was sitting in the desk, hunched over a piece of paper. 

"Hey, Speedy," he said quietly. 

She looked up at him, her eyes clearer than they had been last week. Her hair was mussled, but apart from that she almost looked like Thea again. "Hey Ollie."

Thea stood up and gave her brother a hug. "How are you today?" he asked when they pulled apart. 

Shrugging, she put on a small smile. "Alright. I drew some pictures in crafts today." The sarcasm shone through every word. 

Oliver chuckled and took his sisters hand. When he had retrieved her from Malcolm, she had been deranged. All she would talk about was what a great man Malcolm was and how she didn't want to be in a family of liars. She said Malcolm had never lied to her, had only been truthful. She kept trying to run back to him, but Oliver couldn't lose her again, so he took her to the institution. 

There, when the doctors checked her in, they ran tests on her. They had found reminants of a serum that had effects on memory loss. This, they had guessed, was how Malcolm had brainwashed her. Now, with the serum completely out of her system, Thea was beginning to remember her family, and how much Oliver loved her. 

After his visit with his sister, he returned home. It was really late now, but he still couldn't sleep. Most nights he hardly got two hours of shut eye. All he could think about was Felicity, all his memories of her. Each night, they replayed in his mind, like a movie. The first moment they had met, her smile, the way she made him laugh. Her voice echoed in his ears, and her face projected behind his closed eyes as he lay in his bed at night in the dark. 

This was his life without her. 

The next morning, he awoke with a start. He went into his kitchen and poured himself a glass of scotch. He had taken to drinking now; it was easier to cope with the memories. Then he went over to his computer to look at his schedule for the day.