Forever

Chapter Four

I stayed awake all night.

The very thought of her lying beside me in this cold, unsatisfied bed was enough to keep my eyes open.

Oh, how it broke me.

She's probably fast asleep, huddled up in warmth and security without a single concern for me. She's far away dreaming and I'm here. Though I couldn't help but wonder if I was on her mind. Was I? Could it be true?

Of course not, idiot.

No girl would want a man with such a horrific illness - not even the fans.

You're right.

Maybe it's only sympathy that's keeping her by my side, If the results remain true then she will leave. It's as simple as that. If I'm diagnosed with cancer then; I'm alone.

Though, I'm certain I was born to be alone, I'm already twenty-eight and I have never entered a serious relationship, not ever. And why? Why me? Why can't I have my happy ever after?

Well, it's not hard to guess. You're ugly as fuck, and you can't trust women.

Why do you think I don't trust them? Don't you see I'm only looking out for myself.

No you aren't, you're scared. Too scared to make a move on Serena.

I tired a long time ago...

But you didn't fight, not like she is for you. What does that say about you?!

That's when the tears swell up, my chest heaving as the waterfalls slowly fall down. I bend over, trying to suffocate the aching wail inside my sobs - but they're too powerful.

Before I knew it, I was clutching myself and crying into my knees as my arms rocked my body in a sub-conscious way to comfort myself.

I'm a selfish coward.

Why is she even here, I should tell her to leave.

If it's not forever, what's the point?

She will find a man. A good man with strong morals and a confident view on his future. Certainly not me; a boy living his life in a band, and diagnosed with an illness.

Wait, we don't know that yet.

Didn't you hear the doctors? I'm going to die, not that anyone gives a flying fuck!

Calm down.

Shut the fuck up, what help are you?

You're only hurting yourself!

I told you to-

"Danny?"

I peered up at the blurry girl standing in the darkness.

"What, what..." My voice slowly trailed away as she knelt before me.

I felt my face burn up as I tried to dispose the tears.

"Why are you crying?" She whispered, so soft that her breathe flutters heavenly against my cheek. "Are you afraid?"

"Of, of what?"

"Cancer."

That's not the only thing I'm afraid of...

I gulp hard, my pulse throbbing horrifically in and out of my weakened veins.

Tell her.

"Uh, I..."

For fucks sake, tell her you coward!

"I, Serena...I just-"

"Shhh." She leans in so close that I'm forced to melt into her caramel brown eyes. My heart slowing down as her fingers lace against mine. "Here, grab your coat."

"It's 2AM, Serena."

She grins as she pulls me up from the bed.

"It's a perfect excuse for an early coffee then, right?"

I shake my head, smiling uncontrollably as we walk out hand in hand.

--

AUTHORS NOTE:

I was quite proud of this one tbh.

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Thank you for reading guys, love you.

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Chloe.