Loves possession

Chapter 4

He looks at her and can see it in her face, she believes she disguises it, but he can see her. He can see the hurt through the dark circles that accumulate beneath her eyes and the silent plea that fights to leave her prisoner tongue. She's afraid, afraid of falling and not being caught. Afraid to step out of the comfort zone she's grown so accustomed to. He wants to wrap her up in his arms and hold her tight until the air between them switches from hostile and becomes one they can both breathe. He looks at her like it's the first and last time he'll ever be able to. He notices her fake smile and he'll return it if he thought that that was what she needed in the moment. He'd give his last breath to spend the time he should've spent with her, cherishing and basking in her presence. He knows she's broken inside, it's written all over her face but who is he to point it out. Instead, he'll stay by her side in hope to convince the girl lying on her potential death bed, the girl he's only known for a short time, the girl who's made such an impact on such a callous man- that he is worthy of her.

Sierra's p.o.v
"Because of me?"

"Yes, you Sierra." My face reddens at his sudden closeness. He lifts my chin up so that I'm now facing him.

No.no.no.no. My subconscious screams. But my heart is screaming yes! Which do I listen to? My heart seems set on him but my mind knows if we do this, it's going to become very complicated and I might even lose my job. The job I need. At first I didn't care about the job, I would've done anything to get away from him. But now with Zane back I need it. I need him.

I place my hands on his chest trying to indicate my hesitation. My head drops and I hear a sigh escape his lips. I manage to work up the strength to push him away and with that I ran. Out of his room. Out of his house. I just keep running.

****
I don't know how long I've been gone or where I'm going. I left everything at Nates house; my keys, purse, phone. I know I shouldn't have run out like that and he's going to be pissed as hell if I go back but i had to clear my head and I couldn't do that with him crowding me. I feel as though since I moved in with him, I'm no longer independent. I'm relying on him too much and I can't let that happen. I'm 22 years of age for gods sake.

I don't want to be one of the many women he's used just for his satisfaction. I have pride, morals that I don't want to break or bend those for him. He doesn't love me and he never will. Even if I do have feelings for him I know that they will never be returned. Sleeping with my boss is not the way forward.

The sky gradually gets darker and a flash of lightning seems to be the on set of a downfall. Rain cascades all around, hitting the ground with brute force. I've always loved the rain and for that reason I am okay with not having any cover from it. I hate people who say they love the rain but hide in a shelter or use an umbrella to shield themselves. The rain continues to pour but it's actually quite soothing. It manages to soothe my chaotic mind.

As I carry on walking I begin to feel an irritation in my stomach. After an eventful evening  I'd forgotten about how awful I felt earlier, but now it's slowly creeping back. I run to the nearest trash can and begin to throw up.

I feel a warm hand move the hair that has fallen infront of my face. "Are you okay?" A deep voice asks, a voice I've never heard before. I pull out a tissue from my pocket and wipe my mouth before turning around.

"Y-yes." I try to say more, try to thank the stranger for helping me but all of a sudden I feel my head spin and the sound that once filled my ears slowly drain out, my eyesight becomes blurred and I Black out. But I never hit the cold ground.

"Oh my god. Hello? Shit." That was the last thing I heard before I completely blacked out.

                                                                                        ****
Nates p.o.v