OK KO Oneshots

You're not so bad Fink

 KO sat in his room watching Batman Beyond. He liked to read comic books and watch TV as it gave him strategies to defeat real villains with. One time when Darrel was destroying the bodega he defeated him by imitating Deathstroke's super move. Mr. Gar was proud that KO had defeated Darrel on his own, but also pissed that KO used guns without knowing anything about gun safety. When he got home his mother grounded him and lectured him about the dangers of firearms. Looking back on it it was pretty stupid but it probably looked badass.

"The real batman never talked to you much did he? That's why you were so fixated on him." Terri's voice spoke from the TV.

"Don't play psychoanalyst with me boy." The Joker replied.
KO looked down at a notebook and wrote 'psychoanalyze opponents.'

"Oh I don't need a degree to figure you out." Terri continued. "The real reason you kept coming back was because you never got a laugh out of the old man."

"I'm not hearing this."

"Get a clue clowney he's got no sense of humor, he wouldn't know a good joke if it bit him in the cape. Not that you ever had a good joke."

"Shut up SHUT UP!"

"I mean joy buzzers, squirting flowers, lame. Where's the A material? Make a face, drop your pants, something."

"Shut up, show yourself."

"You make me laugh. But only because I think you're kind of pathetic. Hahahahaha."

"STOP THAT!"

"So you fell in a tank of acid, got your skin bleached and decided to become a super villain. What you couldn't get work as a rodeo clown? Hahahahaha."

"Don't you dare laugh at me!"

"Hahahahahaha, why I thought the Joker always wanted to make Batman laugh."

"YOU'RE NOT BATMAN!"

"KO sweetie," His mother called from downstairs "It's time to go."

"Coming mom." He turned off the TV and made his way downstairs. He hopped in the car. KO looked in his notebook for all the strategies he recorded.   

 Lava is instant death
There's strength in numbers
To live with a lie is to live with a serpent, you must continue to feed it or it will come back to bite you in the buttocks.
Mercy is a strength, not a weakness
Bad guys don't play by the rules
Psychoanalyse opponents

"KO what you reading back there?" His mother called from the front seat.

"Some useful hero tips I recorded."

"Well, we're here." KO jumped out of the car.

"Bye sweetie, I love you!"

"I love you too." He replied.

He walked into Gar's whistling the theme to "Avengers: Earth's mightiest heroes."

"Hey Enid." He said walking past the register.

"Hey KO."

"Hey Rad."

"Hey KO."

"Hey Professor Venomous."

"Hello KO." If KO had been drinking something it would have been an awesome spit take. "PROFESSOR VENOMOUS!"

Enid and Rad instantly jumped to KO's side ready for combat.

"Well now," The mad genius began "Not only did you three ruin an enjoyable evening but you're also the defenders of this bodega. Now I'm going to hurt you twice as much."