What Are You Doing? #LGBT

Chapter 4

October 27th 2014
Maya's P.O.V

Elsa sits to my left and Cam opposite me. He eats his lunch silently, occasionally glancing up at us through the black curls draped over his brow.

"Do yer mind givin' me a bit o' yor sandwich?" I ask Cam. He hesitates, then tears apart the soft white bread and passes it to me. Elsa sips at her straw, staring thoughtfully into the distance. The lunch tables are exceptionally desolate today.

A lone boy sits on a table at the far back, picking at his home-made salad before pushing it aside and casting an ever more disheartening expression. I recognise him as the rather large boy at Cam's birthday a few months ago.
"Are you looking at Finn?" Camden asks without meeting my gaze.

"'ow did yer know? Yer 'aven't looked back once" I respond, eyes narrowed. He shrugs and presses his fingers into the sandwich.
"Don't need to" he says, "Finn sits behind us every lunch break. I'm surprised you haven't noticed yourself, since you sit facing him." I ignore Cam's placid tone. He has no reason to be frustrated. Elsa, on the other hand, finds it hard to realise when he's in a foul mood. At times this can be quite problematic.

"We should invite him over. Maybe he has no friends" she suggests, but with a spiteful tinge to her words. From what I'd gathered since arriving at the school, Cam was an introverted kind of boy (not that much has changed) and lacked friendships.

Only recently had he become part of a small group, that is; Elsa, him and I. Before this, Finn was the only one to acknowledge and speak to him. Right now a muscle twitches at his jaw.

"Yeah" I say, though there's an obvious edge to my voice. Elsa waves her hands around to catch Finn's attention. He watches her, a little frightened, then notices the back of Cam's head and smiles. We watch as he waddles over to our table and takes the seat beside Cam (whom hadn't shifted his position nor facial expression even once.)

For a fraction of a second the atmosphere is awkward, until Elsa clears her throat and leans forwards. Clearly, she'd leaned way too far for comfort. Finn blinks rapidly and his eyes widen with nerve. It doesn't come as a surprise to anyone that Elsa is quite beautiful, enough to make your heart beat when you recognise it.

"Why do you always sit by yourself? You can start to hang out with us, you know?" she says in a rather soothing voice. Before Finn could give a stuttering response Cam speaks first.

"Perhaps he felt too scared to come up to us. After all, you do act superior towards your classmates" he mutters, head low. Elsa pauses, then grins and reaches over to ruffle his dark curled hair. I can't say that either one of us isn't used to Cam's never-ending bitterness, especially to Elsa.

Since my first encounter with him, I'd assumed he was a small and nervous wreck, but now he'd become a small and sarcastic wreck. A bell rings out across the building, signalling the end of break.
"Wot class do yer lot 'ave now?" I ask, licking crumbs from my fingers.

"Math" Elsa and Finn exclaim in unison. I glance at Camden. Whatever, I needn't know what class he's in, if he doesn't want to say. As the four of us leave the cafeteria and Elsa and Finn split off, Cam steps on the back of my shoe to prevent me from heading to Chemistry. I stumble forwards slightly, then push my foot back into my shoe and turn around with a scowl.

"Wot, Cam? Quit bein' such a downer. It's right getting on my nerves, OK? Ever since that thing 'appened wiv Elsa yer won't stop moping about."
This seemed to have hit a nerve, because Cam flinches.

To put it into context, two months after I'd met Cam and Elsa, we'd hung out loads. Not much had changed from them times, except on August 12th I was confessed to.

Elsa took the liberty to make me a cake on my 13th birthday and then kissed me in the kitchen whilst Cam was playing Fortnite upstairs. It wasn't very romantic, especially since we were in Cam's home and it was sloppy, but I'm 13.

Nothing could've made my day more than being kissed by Elsa. After that I told Cam all about it, but my expectations were diminished when he didn't ask any questions at all. In fact, his brow furrowed for the rest of the day and he kept on fidgeting about, as if he were trying to decide on something important.

"No, I'm just.." he begins, then slowly trails off. I throw my hands up in expiration.
"Wot? Yor straight up wastin' my time! Are yer that jealous that I were kissed and not yer?"

The babble of passing students in the hall halts. Some look around to see where my shout came from, whilst others giggle and gasp. One boy (whom I recognise as Tyler from Chemistry) pushes his finger into Cam's shoulder and sneers.

"You've never been kissed before? Are you gay or something?"

In my school back in Britain, the chances of this happening and being physically assaulted for not having shared a kiss at the age of twelve and thirteen were practically unrealistic. The bottom line is; all of the students had only ever been kissed goodnight by their mothers.

Perhaps that's why the incident with Elsa came as such a shocker to me. I prod Tyler back, despite our height difference. Even so, he's twice Cam's size.
"'e's not gay, man. Just carry on walkin'."

But Tyler decides to continue the conversation, despite how it's not-his-conversation-to-butt-in-on, nor is it any by standers entertainment.

"Huh? Look at him! No wonder he hasn't been kissed. His only options are to resort to being gay" he laughs, nudging a nearby friend. A muscle dances in Cam's jaw. For a moment I thought he was going to brush it off, until he looks up through his black curls to meet my stare.
"Thanks, Maya" he mutters.

                                                          ***********

I sit through Chemistry with only the look that Cam gave me swimming around my mind. It had hit me like a brick. Before he stalked off I attempted to apologise profusely but he'd brushed my hand away with inanimate eyes. Never once in the time that I'd known him had he given me such an expression.

I'm shaken into focus by Luce, her fingertips Luke-warm from meddling with the Bunsen burner.
"Wot?" I mumble, still a little lost in thought.

"Wot do yer mean wot? Yer way too busy dreamin' instead of focusin' on the task!" she responds. My gaze shifts to Mr. Siron. He seems rather preoccupied with a student struggling to find the periodic table at the back of a textbook.

"Wotever, teacher ain't lookin'"
"Right" Luce says firmly, slamming the glass beaker down. My eyes lazily travel to my sister.
"Careful" I sigh, "that's glass."

"I don't give a damn if it's glass or not. Wot the hell 'as gotten into yer, 'ave you gone insane or just stupid?"
Faint red patches surface on her cheeks. I feel guilty for sparking an anger, but almost lamented at the same time.

"Nothin'" I decide is the best answer. However, Luce does not.
"God, Foxy! Jus' tell me woss up, cos' yor actin' real strange. 'as someone bin botherin' yer? Jus' punch 'em! Yer know wot ter do-"
"No! I would never punch 'em...they're too wee an' feeble.."

Finally, she relaxes with an understanding smile. Her next and only word is all that needs to be confirmed.
"Camden?" she says. I lower my head.
"Well, wotever 'append wiv Cam, jus' sort it out after school. I'm pretty sure he'll forgive yer easily, he always does. Don't worry, eh, Foxy? Can't 'ave been that bad."

That's debatable. Clearly being called gay had struck a nerve within Cam, though I hadn't thought it as a big deal. Perhaps he's homophobic. Even so, I quickly want to figure this out.

If there's something I can't bear more than not talking to Cam it'd be...nothing.

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I'm sorry that the chapters are always quite short. I might do something about it.