Fighting with Bipolar and winning!!

Starting to see God's bigger plan throughout my mental illness

If I had to chose to be bipolar 1 or bipolar 2, I would have to pick bipolar type one. With bipolar type one, we do not have any depression. We are always hyper. We always have a lot of energy. We always get a lot accomplished. We just need medication to simply slow down or make you tired. All of my daughters friends think that I am the coolest mother. I am the one that takes them camping all summer. I am the one that takes them  roller skating, bowling, to the beach and big swimming pool's. From what I have seen, people with bipolar to struggle with depression and more suicidal thoughts. They spend more time at home. They like to isolate themselves. A lot of people get the SAD lamps. They do get hypomanic if not enough sleep, but they do not get into the scary kind of manic episodes to where they are generally hospitalized. Unfortunately, they are known to find themselves having affairs as well. It surprises me how many people that are bipolar smoke. I am not positive about the actual percentage, I believe 30% higher chance of smoking cigarettes and I know for sure that we die earlier than the average person because of our anxiety and smoking. I am currently a smoker and I smoke a lot when I am manic. I am slowly killing myself and I know it. I have three beautiful daughters that need me to put my cigarettes out and focus on them. Most of the people with bipolar two are hospitalized because of their depression. So, if I had to pick what kind of bipolar I would have I would definitely pick the bipolar one. Not everybody gets approved of disability. I praise the Lord that I was one chosen to get benefits for the rest of my life. I have been told that Social Security does not give backpay anymore. But back in 2013 I found out that I was approved. I applied in 2011. They did back pay for me and cut me a check for a little over 10 grand. I don't want to brag about my money and I have to be careful. I just want you to realize the importance of tithing. I feel like God blessed me with disability because I was faithful in giving my 10% to the offering plate. I have had my struggles of thinking to myself sometimes if I don't tithe this month, I can pay the credit card bill off and not have to pay interest. I get so convicted when I think like that. All I know is if you tithe  your 10% of your earnings in the offering plate, that God will bless you. Tithe goes to the church. After your tithing is when you go beyond tithing and you bless people. That is called your offering. I am known as a giver. God blesses is a cheerful giver and he certainly did bless me. You can never out give God. But sometimes when I am sick, I give away too much. I have even given my daughters clothes away. I have given jewelry from my mother-in-law away. A great example is when I went into the hospital, I came out without any shoes because I gave my slippers away. I just want to encourage you today. If you are struggling financially, take this challenge... Put your 10% in the plate and see what God will do with that!