The Way We Love

Night Runs (Part 1)

     You aren't a bridge, but yet I can't cross life without you.

  You aren't a dying rose, but yet I wither in your presence.

       You nothing like a dictionary, but yet I can look up the meaning of your love and know that it will never change.

The darkling soot of our pain was crepuscular, burning under bellowing spells of hazy filaments and smoke clouds.

You're fading like the trembling ashes that fall from the bud of a cigarette. So, I'll take you deep into my lungs until I taste you under my breath.

I can't forget the diminishing light in his stoic dark eyes, ebbed with the bitter pangs of reality. I saw Figs pull the darkness from the sky until he eclipsed, shuttering from the coldness that filled his mind.

"Shit!" I cursed, watching Figs runoff.

I walked up to Ed, who was standing at the station door letting a cool breeze drift through his damp open shirt, "please don't say I told you so" I warned.

Ed shook his head, his gun still neatly tucked away at the side of his belt, "go make sure he's okay" he addressed me firmly.

I shook my head, "he's fine" I lied, looking down.

The truth was I afraid to see the damage I had caused. I wasn't sure how to deal with someone else's hurt.

Ed crossed his arms, her grey eyebrows furrowed into the deep wrinkles of his forehead. He looked at me with disapproval, "that boy is hurting. He's scared and alone Paul!"

Ed pointed a finger at me, "Now, go do the right thing." he gently encouraged.

I bit my lip nervously, a game of tug of war took place between my heart and mind.

What could I say to comfort someone who had just experienced something so horrible?

What if Feather blamed me for not protecting her brother?

Ed gave me a gentle shove, "go!" he urged, "Even if he's upset, you are the only one who can help him" he said, reading my mind.

I rolled my eyes, "fine!" I grumbled, taking off running after Figs.

My heart pounded as my feet carried me past the brightly illuminated streets and colorful murals. I turned the corner, entering Feather's peaceful neighborhood adjacent to the twinkling lights of the city that filled the sky like flickering lanterns.

I took in the view of the houses, wishing to be the warmth that greeted one at the door or the smile that opened as wide as a welcoming party. I wished more than anything at this moment to one day have a place of my own.

My feet skidded to pause, as I stood in front of the familiar house with the bells chimes and the red door, knocking I prayed that no one would answer.

Feather answered the door. A look of confusion streaked across her face, "what happened?" she asked, outstretching her arms.

I held her small frame against my chest, her cool skin flushed in my embrace as I tried to remain calm, "Can, I speak to him?" I asked.

Feather nodded, opening the door wide as she stepped aside, "he just came in screaming and crying like a madman. I've never seen him this hysterical" she pointed upstairs, "he's in his room breaking things..." she shuttered.

I nodded grimly heading to his room.

Feather grabbed my hand, her fingers trembled under my grasp, "thank you for coming back" she smiled shyly.