Time Is All We Need

Chapter 23

Have you ever felt like you're in the middle of a black hole? Like you're completely stuck, in a trance, within your own thoughts? You feel like time is slipping through your fingers, you feel paralyzed. The crippling feeling of uselessness dawns upon you. It holds you as a prisoner in your own mind.

That's exactly how Alison felt. It was hell waiting for news and for the two girl's' parents to show up for Emily and Alison's company. It was almost worse when they actually showed up though. The look on Pam's face nearly shattered her into a trillion pieces instead of the million pieces she was already in. It killed her to see Pam's face. Her eyes were puffy, her cheeks still stained with tear tracks. She saw the glimmer of tears in Wayne's eyes. Emily was so much like her father. Emily was "stone hearted" in a way just like her father was. The only time Emily really ever got emotional was when she felt like she was royally fucking things up, or extremely overwhelmed.

At first, Pam was honestly relieved that Emily was so much like Wayne. Once believed to be impossible, she was surprised to know there was a better, more kind hearted person than Wayne. And it was Emily. Wayne was a great man, by every measure. But he was a firm believer in treating others how they treat you, or deserve to be treated. He wasn't mean, no, not by any means. But he wasn't giving, or patient, with those who didn't deserve his kindness.

Emily on the other hand, went above and beyond for everyone. Even when some of her classmates picked on her and teased her, she still looked out for them. Emily had always insisted that she'd never been bullied, but Pam knew better. Wayne knew better. Emily just never classified it as bullying, because she didn't know what it was like to be treated normally by her peers. Yet, Emily still held doors for them, was very friendly, and even helped a couple of them with their studies.

Pam missed having a young, and growing, Emily in her home. She missed her spunky, and at most times, quiet kid. She missed that innocence. She missed Emily rushing in the house, from building her tree fort in the woods across the street, complaining that she was starving. The kid ate as fast as Pam could cook. She missed tucking Emily in bed, saying prayers together, kissing her forehead before she left the brunette's room. She missed driving her to school, singing whatever song came on the radio together. She missed having that Emily in her life, but she couldn't bear to lose that forever.

Jessica's eyes were puffy too, for two big reasons. Alison finally found someone she deeply cared for, and someone who cared for Ali even more. She hated to see Ali so crushed, so devastated. But it also hurt her to see this happen to Emily. To see someone so selfless take on a task this big, for the second time, hurt. It hurt badly. God really wasn't fair. Because if he was, then this would've never happened to someone so amazing as Emily in the first place.

The sound of her pager rose her from her sleep. She had the day off tomorrow, but unfortunately that meant that she was on call tonight. She groaned, and slipped out of bed. Toby had rolled over and mumbled a "see you later" before she had even managed to look at her pager. She saw in bold letters:

'OR 2. E. FIELDS. RESPIRATORY'

"Toby."  Spencer gasped, her heart now hammering in her own chest. "Toby, it's Emily."

Both Toby and Spencer sporadically started freaking out. While Spencer got ready, Toby grabbed the report that was faxed to their house for her to read while she got dressed. Spencer wasn't even really sure how she managed to get to the hospital, let alone the operating room, but none-the-less, she did.

Thank god they already had the brunette under anesthesia, otherwise Emily probably would've made her promise to take care of Ali, or something dramatic that Spencer wouldn't be able to handle before she cut Emily open. She worked like a machine, but she couldn't believe she just cracked open Emily's chest. She had the honor of working with the chief, but that also meant it was a high risk case.