girls • lil peep [✔️]

two

i look at myself in the mirror, looking at my greasy black hair and my ruined makeup from last night. i feel like shit, but i'm not completely hungover.

i take off my makeup, washing my face before i shower. i really just wanted to feel hot water on my body, i feel fucking dirty. before i get in the shower, i walk to my bedroom and look out my window to see if anyone is home. nobody is.

i walk back to the bathroom, opening the glass door to the shower and getting in.

-
i pull up my black jeans, adjusting my fishnets through the holes. i look in my closet, looking for my black spaghetti strap crop top, grabbing it when i see it.

i slide on a pair of black vans and grab my phone, walking downstairs. i don't really have anything to do today at all. my mom isn't home, so i might as well go somewhere. but slight problem with that is, i don't have anyone to hang out with today. at all.

but then it comes to me. last night, that guy from the party. he gave me his number after he got out of my car last night.

i find the little napkin, typing the number into my phone. i text it, hoping that this isn't weird.

scarlet ; heyy, its the bitch who gave you a ride home last night lol

i press send, and wait for him to text me back. i walk into the kitchen to grab a bottle of voss. water is the only thing i drink besides alcohol, because other shit is bad for you and will make you fat.

i sit down on a bar stool, feeling my phone vibrate. i immediately pick it up.

gus ; whats up

scarlet ; nothing just wanna see if you want to hang maybe today ?

gus ; haha yea yea im down. u want me to pick u up or?

scarlet ; i can drive to wherever

gus ; ight, heres my address just pull up whenever

gus ; 1115 berkshire cove

scarlet ; haha ok

i close my phone, grabbing my car keys and heading out to my car. he said pull up whenever, so i guess i'll just go now. it's not like i have anything else better to do right now.

i pull up in front of the same house that i was at last night when i dropped him off. it looks like a nice trap house to be completely honest.

i get out of my car, walking up to the front door. i see a guy on the porch rolling a blunt, and he smiles at me.

"hi, where's peep?" i ask.

"haha, gus is inside. he should be on the couch, probably popping a xan or somethin'." he says, continuing to roll his weed.

i open the cracked door, stepping inside of the house. it smells like weed and cologne. i walk down the short hall, seeing a living room and a kitchen along with some stairs. i look at the kitchen table, seeing weed, xanax and coke along with other drugs on the table.

"looking for something?" i hear a voice say, startling me. i actually jump.

"i uh- um, sorry. i was just looking for.. well, you i guess." i stutter on my own words, trying to get myself together. god, i am an absolute mess.

"i still don't know your name. tell me?" he asks me, pouting his lip.

"scarlet. my name is scarlet, and yours is gus." i answer.

"it's not actually, thats just a nickname. my actual name is gustav, but seriously call me peep or gus." he says to me.

"you have a lot of tattoos. i have some too." i say, sitting down on the couch.

"i can see, and i think that's really fuckin' hot." he admits to me as he sits down across from me. "you got any on your ass?" he asks, and i chuckle because i actually do.

"yes, actually gus i do. i have a rose on my left ass cheek." i giggle, covering my face.

"i'm sorry that was kind of rude, i'm not like that at all, i swear." he says apologetically. i feel kind of bad because he's saying sorry. he didn't even offend me at all.

"it's fine, you're fine don't even worry about it." i say, smiling.

he shrugs his shoulders, sinking into the couch. i watch as he grabs a bar off of the glass table in between us, crushing it up. "you're going to snort that?" i ask, watching him. "yes. want to join?"

i nod my head. i didn't really know that he did drugs like that, but i'm not surprised.

"why do you do drugs, gus?" i ask him, looking as a feeling of hurt washes over his face. "you're asking me why? well, if i'm being real it's because it numbs the pain. not just cause of that tho, i just fuck with em like that." he answers, spreading out the crushed powder with a credit card.

"numbs what pain, exactly?"

a moment of silence settles between us after i ask that question. maybe it's too personal?

"the mental pain. i've been so fucked up in my mind, i take hella drugs to escape reality i guess. i know it's there but, it helps me get through shit easier i guess." he states.

i nod my head, moving over to sit next to him. he evenly distributed the lines, four of them. two for each of us. i roll up a dollar bill that was laying on the table, bending down and putting it at the start of the line. i inhale as fast and hard as i can, sniffling from the burning pain in my nose.

he looks at me, in shock. "i didn't think you'd actually do lines, jesus." he says, shocked.

"i did cocaine last night, this ain't shit to me. i guess you could say i'm just as fucked up as you are, mentally at least." i say, taking a cigarette and lighting it.

"why?" he questions me.

"cause just like you said, i'm fucked up in the head. drugs help me get away i guess, they make me happy."

"why? you're too pretty to be a sad bitch." he says, making me laugh.

"well, thank you i think, but i don't know. i went through a lot of shit in the past and i guess it still has a big ass impact on me now." i explain to him, well try to.

"yea, music is another escape for me. i'm blowing up right now, it's good but fame is kind of stressful. i don't want to use it in a bad way, or let it change me ya know?" he says, rolling up a dollar bill.

"yea, i feel you gus."

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do yall like this book so far ? lmk :)