monster./ park bogum

number 4.

PARK BOGUM.

suhee turned to me once again, and i tried to hide my smile from her last statement. "what you said made me think."

i looked at her. "about what?"

"maybe i'm not cut out to do what i want to do."

"if you want to do something, do it even if there are consequences." i said.

"i suppose." she muttered. "what do you want to do then?"

"i don't know." i muttered. find the real you again.

we sat in a comfortable silence, looking out into the dark waves of the river, the bright moon reflecting off of it's glassy surface. when we both decided it was getting late, she thanked me and i watched her walk off into the distance.

i chuckled. "she didn't even ask for my name..."

—

i sighed, walking away from the handsome stranger that came to me in the middle of the night. i shook my head and facepalmed. "i didn't even ask for his name."

regardless, the heart-aching events that occurred earlier involving sungho had disappeared. but my feelings for him stayed.

i still had his knife. i'll ask for his forgiveness. i don't want to make any enemies any longer.

—

there was another interrogation scheduled today, except those other detectives chickened out and made me watch instead of being a part of it.

they won't find enough evidence anyways. there's never enough.

i always win.

"attorney kim. you may see your client now." one of the guards said, therefore leading me inside to the interrogation room.

i saw the two detectives from before and nodded at them. "did it go well?"

the detective pursed his lips and stood up. "this is bullshit. someone messed with the evidence. they have had to. there's not enough to prove—"

"you cannot blame your lack of information on someone else. there's a lack of information for a reason. he. didn't. do. it." i said.

"you're so childish, attorney kim."

"you can call me childish once you've proven me wrong." i said. "i hope you have a nice day, then."

me and my client headed out the interrogation room, and i felt a weight lift off a shoulders.

but another one added at the same time.

—

when evening came, i headed to sungho's apartment. i had the knife in my purse, either to return it or protect myself with it. it would have to depend on his choice.

it was my crime. i don't blame him for wanting to kill me at all. this isn't the first time. but this time, i'll admit to it.

because i love him.

i drew in a breath before exiting my car, my boots light clicking against the stairs—the only sound that occupied this quiet night.

i found his room, the door old and rusted like the last time i was here. i lightly knocked.

the door swung open, with kwang sungho standing there in the doorway, casually dressed and wearing a grim expression.

"are you really not afraid of dying?" he asked. "i gave you a chance to run."

i let out a sigh and looked at my feet.

sungho opened the door wider, and i stepped inside.

i stood in front of him, my jaw clenching. if this was a normal day, we'd be smiling and talking like normal people. but it was never going to be like that again.

"i'm sorry." i said. "i'm sorry for killing her."

sungho's eyes got darker. "can sorry...bring her back, suhee?"

i shook my head. "i just wanted to say sorry, so i can leave with a less burden."

"just saying sorry lessens your burden?" he asked. "i never loved you. you deserve it. you deserve not ever being loved."

"i know." i muttered, before taking out sungho's knife and setting it lightly on the table next to us.

i turned on my heels, heading for the door until i heard a small click behind me and whipped my head around once again.

i stopped breathing. i should've expected this.

"kim suhee, i'm really going to kill you this time." sungho said, his hand shaking as he pointed a gun straight at me.