The Holiest Holy Water and Other Holy Goods

Tour and Rules

   Welcome sinners to our shop please take off your shoes before entering, first I'll take you on a tour of our many Holy places.

   Straight ahead is the fountain of holy bleach, this is where we harvest the holy bleach. The holy bleach is the holiest thing you can get to drink or bathe in. It is very cleansing but sadly the price is free so it's very expensive.

   Next to it is the pool of holy water, you may bathe in it fully clothed. It's not as good as the holy bleach but it will do the job. A classic among lemon readers to cleanse themselves after reading the horrid books. You may find most of them in stories such as Creepypasta, or (insert person)xReaders.

   If we turn this corner here is the Holy Bible grove, where we grow our bibles as holy as we can. See there? That's a bible bush it's getting ready to sprout some new holy into this sinning world. You can get about almost any size needed for your sinful mind. Mind that they do wear overtime so be careful and keep it cleansed.

   A personal favorite of mine is hidden inside the grove, the spring of holiness. It bursts forth great imenses of holiness that you can get cleansed by. The mist carries far into the shop so you might just get cleansed anywhere.

   As we exit the grove you can see the holy water beach coliding with the sand. It is a very relaxing place indeed. To the far left you can see where the holy water beach and the holy bleach beach colide with one another. If you stand in the middle of the two you will get extra cleansed.

   Over here is another grove of holy bibles but because they are ner the holy bleach beach, they are soaked in the holy bleach. This is probably the most powerful holy artifact we have and the most expensive by being free-er than free.

   Across the way is the Holy Cross forest, here are the holiest crosses you can find. Go ahead and pick on on me, you can put them on a necklace. If you hold them in front of something unholy it will leave.

   Next to it is the Holy Strawberry Bleach suite, this is where you can stay in our shops. It has free holy strawberry bleach you can buy weather you are staying there or not. It is a very exotic mixture indeed, but it will do the job.

   Here is a one of my friend's choice of addition, Holy Chocolate. Here the holy chocolate is plentiful, a fountain spurting up streams of the holiness. We have many varieties of holy chocolate including, dark holy chocolate, milk holy chocolate, cookies and cream holy chocolate, and white chocolate. 

   Ah here is the Holy CLOROX, it isn't much but it's something. You can bathe in the pool (fully clothed of course) and get cleansed. Or you can go into the warm hot tub where you get cleansed quicker and more efficient.

   Next to the Holy CLOROX is my favorite, Holy Candies. They are sweet and holy, nothing more to say about that.

   Now that you know where to find everything here are the rules.

1. Never go into a pool, fountain, or beach wearing anything but your clothing. For that will de-purify it and it will take many moons to purify.

2. Always come here when needed, wether it's reading a lemon or a dirty thought. If you need to come here always do.

3. Women on their period cannot wade or swim in any of the holy water or holy bleach.

4. Recommend us to your sinning friends.

5. Follow the rules.

   Now that's it for the tour and rules, visit any area of the shop to buy. We are also always expanding so come back frequently. See you at the shops.