Eunoia

Self-harm :(

I am not proud of what I did to myself

But the scars they left

Show me that I survived my battle

And that's what makes me proud

I survived.

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There are things I said I would never do

There are fears I cannot believe have come true

For my soul is too sick, too little, and too late

And myself, I have grown weary to hate.

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I babysit this six-year-old and I was wearing shorts today and my scars were showing. He poked them and he said, "I know how those got there" I replied, "How?" He looked at me with a straight face and he said, "I've seen them before. My big sister had them and she said mean people put them on your body when they weren't nice to you because if people are mean to you, you end up being mean to yourself. my big sister went away. I don't know where she went. Mommy said she's on a happy vacation somewhere because she was too sad here. I miss her. Don't go on vacation please."

I don't think I've cried so hard in front of someone in my life.

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