Your Love

1.

You'll always find someone, don't doubt it.

Cashè
So, I've been single for the longest. Reasons why? I have trust issues, a lot of them, too many feelings of not trusting someone. Every single time I try or get into a relationship, I give them a little background on my past relationships, (says how people hurt me... etc), they would comprehend that right? Then they'll still cheat on me and hurt me in some type of form. Ironic right? I just gave up on relationships, I want one, but I gave up. It doesn't matter to me. Fuck the relationship era... let's talk about how I'm moving to another state. So, today I'm moving to California. My family wanted a new start to everything because New Orleans was hell, and it had a lot of bad memories. Let's talk about my hometown.

New Orleans. Everyone loved New Orleans. It was the party place, very eager and exciting for any visitors. It was just the crime that drew the originals from New Orleans. The crime was horrific.... The places where everyone wanted to have fun, someone made it into a crime event, killing the innocent who were just tryna have fun. Life was hard down here for anyone who actually knew about all of the crime that happens.. Our house got shot up because of drug dealers that were behind us, me and my mother almost got shot in our head. We moved. Wasn't no better, yea our house got shot up in the ward I was from, but there were robbing(s), gunshots, mess, and drug dealers... It wasn't no better but it was better because WE didn't deal with it. This basically concludes why we moved.

Now. Another topic, my life. Now I been gay, been.. Never would show it tho. I kept it on the down low, just from my family, knowing how judgmental and religious they are. They found out about this girl and I confessed. The rest of that year WASN'T easy. I cried almost every night, I fought my sister physically... I was mentally STRESSED. Me being gay and the affect it had on me and my parents were very stressful, on top of school and trying to keep a 3.0 gpa and up. Til this day it's still hard to manage with my family. My father thinks I'll change my mind in the future about being gay, recently, I got an therapist for the problems I go through. I've been introduced to new LGBTQ+ groups around my city, too bad I'm moving. I'm gonna miss everyone who supported me and my decisions.

Leaving
Well, it's time to say goodbye to New Orleans, even though I NEED to move, I don't want to leave.. Yeah, the crime is horrible but at the end of the day, I have friends that's as close as family to me, I will come back and see them, other than that we will always text and talk to each other. We looked at one house in Cali, it was very nice but simple but that was going to change once my mother got her hands on it and starts decorating the place. We left, we kept little things, considering that we were going on a plane because the car ride was too long. Some of the things we really cherished went to my grandmother to keep and if we wanted to get it, she'll have it.
We arrived to the airport, we didn't talk much, it was very awkward... I just had my headphones in, listening to my music and on my phone until I got that tap that meant it was time to leave. Well 40 minuets later, I got that tap and we got on the plane, I turned on a calming artist, PARTYNEXTDOOR, and put on his slow, calming songs while looking out of the window, admiring the sky and the view of New Orleans from the sky. After a long slumber, we were finally in California. It was beautiful.... Never seen nothing like it. We got a rental before we bought a car. We drove to the new house, it was a quiet ride for me because of my music but for my mother and father, the were talking the whole time, I don't know about what, I just saw their lips moving as i bopped my head to the music I was listening to.

As we approached the house, I stared in awe. It was beautiful, it was the house I've always wanted.