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i guess you don't really need this tape, stan. you already know how much pain i was going through. but yet you chose to ignore me just like the rest of the world did. for that whole year, you knew exactly how i was feeling and what i was willing to do to myself in order to feel better. for crying out loud, you even stood back and watched me almost kill myself. sorry you missed out on seeing the real thing.
it had been two weeks since will had gotten his cast off and also since troy and his little squad had bothered him. he was grateful for that. dustin had now stopped talking to him completely, won't even look in his direction. another friend lost because he's out of the closet. it's funny, really, you could be best friends with someone your whole life, but once a small factor changes, they'll act like they never even knew you in the first place.
now that the worst of the storm was over and will was back to being unnoticed by most of the school (minus the regular dirty looks, homophobic slurs and shoulder nudges), he decided that he should tell someone about how he's been feeling. a close friend, someone he could trust, but not so close that they'd be at his side 24/7. 'max? no way. not as long as lucas sinclair is her boyfriend. mike? hell. no. he would be way too overprotective, worse than mom. eddie? probably wouldn't take it seriously. bill? possibly. although things are still a little awkward from... ~that~ night. stan?' will's mind lingered on the thought of stanley uris for a minute. they had been friends for over four years, but it's not like he was any mike wheeler. it was decided that stan would be the best option.
opening up to you was one of the worst decisions of my life. not only was i sharing the most private part of my life, i was also giving you the power to tell anyone you desired. and i think we can all guess who you went running to first.
oh come on, stan, we all know you've got the hots for my ex.
that afternoon once he arrived home, will went straight to his room, sat on his bed, ripped a page out of the back of his science notebook, and began to write. his hand was firmly gripped around the pen as he wrote vigorously, words flying down onto the piece of paper. a few teardrops accompanied them, smudging some of the wet ink.
once the page had been filled right down to the bottom and will was sure that he had said absolutely everything, he signed off and stuffed it in his backpack, ready to put it into stan's locker the next morning.
looking back at it now, i have no idea why i trusted you. i should have known that you didn't really care about me. more like you didn't want to be associated with me. cause heaven forbid, we wouldn't want anyone thinking you're gay too! oops, my mistake, we wouldn't want anyone finding out that you're actually gay.
