Hurdles

CHAPTER 6

Surah Yusuf, Verse 86:
قَالَ إِنَّمَا أَشْكُو بَثِّي وَحُزْنِي إِلَى اللَّهِ وَأَعْلَمُ مِنَ اللَّهِ مَا لَا تَعْلَمُونَ

He said: I only complain of my grief and sorrow to Allah, and I know from Allah what you do not know.

Zaitun

Noooo!!! I shrieked making a jolt from sleep away from a horrible nightmare.

Body quivering, throat and lips parched like a lost soul in a no end desert, trails of tears and incoherent words mumbled by my lips to which I know nothing of what it entails.

Zaituun!!

I heard a faint voice which seems so close yet so far enveloping me and shaking my broken physique,  a reflection of my life, BROKEN

"Its okay, everything's fine,just a horrible dream, its all gone now I am here" said the calming voice of which the silhouette of the owner seems blurry and I couldn't place it for being either from my eyes blurred with tears or my cerebrum refusing to access anything and all I could do was stare ahead blankly like a confused spectator watching the unfold of an event.

The seeping warmth of the body embracing me slowly began clutching free my mind muddled with almost everything and nothing and I could now make sense of the person beside me whose face is that which always grace me after my panic attacks.

I think am grateful that I awoke from the haunting scene of my usual nightmare but is it any different because being awake only put my torment to life and confirms the harsh reality of life making it no less better than the dream.

"M-my eyes are heavy I want to sleep...b-but at the same time I don't want to" I had croaked with difficulty and saying that was all it took for me bursting into uncontrollable sobs clutching direly onto her as if my life depended on it.

"Shhh" she had calmed me down with a teary voice.

"Go to sleep" she added stroking my hair, tucking me into the bed and retrieved my phone from the bedside drawer, tuning onto the  recitation of suratul yaseen she placed it next to me and slowly but surely I began drifting into a state of slumber my heaving chest slowing down its pace.

"Fa inna ma'al usri yusra ( verily with every hardship comes ease) my mantra for solitude,  I had chanted inwardly lazily the sleep taking a strong hold on me.

Faintly taking in the form beside me leaving for the door with dropping eyes I had slowly muttered

"Don't leave me also"

Before falling into a deep slumber.

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"And it came tumbling on me"

Anisa finished followed by Aisha doubling in laughter almost falling off the bench we were sitted on tears falling off her eyes.

"Oh my God that was hilarious" Aisha added wiping off the tears from the corner of her eyes and just on cue they all turned towards me.

"That was funny right? Aisha questioned looking at me hopefully with Anisa also joining the stare.

"Er-rm yea"

I said trying hard to evoke a smile but failing and I didn't miss out the way their face fell. They are always doing things to please me and try bringing smile on my face but who were we kidding.

"Zaituun  please its high time you....

" I need to go" I said interrupting Anisa because I know where that lecture is going.