The HeartBreaker

Chapter 18: Alive?

Jake

I feel like a fucking asshole. I shouldn't have of told Abigail like that and honestly I contemplated telling her at all. Our relationship was beginning to be normal and I loved having her around. I miss the way she used to smile at me, or how I was always there for her when she needed someone and I can see it in her eyes that she needs someone. All her ghosts from her past are coming out and are affecting her in some way. I can't take her pain away unless I take the ghosts away which means starting with Ryan.

I was and still astonished on how she found him and how I didn't notice that night when I saw him walk out of the house that he was Franco's son. I didn't even know he had a child, he must have kept him hidden so this day could come. Abigail left me 2 days ago and I'm going crazy. I found her phone on the road and it was cracked. I looked up and down every place I know she would go but I can't find her and deep down I know something happened to her and it hurts. I did this to her, I made her run away and she could possibly be injured or worse; dead.

I contacted Chrissy and Luke and they haven't heard from her since the night she called them sobbing and then when they told her they knew about me being the leader of the cartel, she lost it and ended the call and that's the last they heard of her.

"Hey, Jake, we'll find her." Andrew says and I just nod and stare at the wall. He's been at my house for these 2 days because I haven't even made it out of the house. I've been cooped up in my house trying to find where she went or what happened to her. So far, I haven't found anything and that pisses me off. If I can't find her now, will I ever find her?

"Jake, snap the fuck out of it. Do you even care for this girl? You have never been this way over what? A good fuck? A distraction?" He said and I flew out of my chair and wrapped my hand around his throat pushing him against the wall.

"Don't you ever talk about her like that ever again. I don't care if you're like a brother to me but I will knock your lights out. I haven't felt like this about anyone, you're right. I don't know what it is about her, but I can't stop thinking about her and it hurts. I did this to her, Andrew. She's gone because of me and my stupid life. Do you know how that makes me feel? Well, I feel like shit because of it and I won't rest until I find her and she's back in my arms, where she belongs." I say and release my grip on his neck and falls on the ground coughing.

"I'm sorry man, I wanted to make sure you're alright." He says hoarsely and I nod.

"Now, go home Andrew, you need rest." I say and he nods and gives me a bro hug and I hug him back. After he leaves I decided that I'm not going to wallow in self-pity and go look for Abigail. I grab my keys and just as I was about to walk down my stairs, a knock sounds at my door and I walk and open it.

"Jake,I-" Abigail croaks but then she falls into my arms, motionless. I panic and think about bringing her to a hospital but then they will start to ask questions and I can't have her go through that and especially me, I can't let anyone find out who I am.

I bring her up in my room and sit her in the tub and start washing off the blood and then after that, I sit her in my chair and start to sew up her wound and then clean off her bruised hands, mostly from fighting her way out of wherever she was. She's so pale,weak and skinny and I can't help but feel, I did this to her, I made her be like this. After my self pity, I pick her up and stick one of my shirts on her and than lay her in my bed and cover her up with the covers and then I go and clean up the bathroom. After I'm done I go and sit on the bed next to her and hold her small and petite hand in mine.

"Abigail, where were you? I'm so so sorry." I say and feel tears start to come and I push them back, I can't cry. I'm not weak.

I climb in next to her and end up falling asleep; after being awake for 2 days looking for her and being worried out of my mind but now she's here with me and she won't leave me.

***

I wake up, startled and find Abigail twisting and turning in her sleep.

"No, he's not dead. No! Get off of me." She screams and tears stream down her face.

I shake her and finally she jolts upright and looks around as she confused to where she is. She looks at me and her tears start again and she holds her hand to her mouth and she starts sobbing and I pull her to me and she rests her head on my chest and I rub my hand up and down her back.

"I thought you were dead. He told me you were dead." She finally says and I tense up.

"Who? Who told you I was dead?" I ask and she sits up and I follow her. She stares at the wall for sometime until she says what I was dreading to hear.

"Ryan, Ryan, he told me that you were dead. He took me that night I ran out but I didn't fight, I went willingly and I can't remember anything else after he stabbed me and punched me so hard that I blacked out most of the time. I remember trying to fight my way out of there and I thought I saw someone that I knew but I really couldn't piece it together. I was going to die, you," she turned to face me, "you were the reason why I was out so late and why all of this happened to me but stupid me, came here hoping you were alive and I don't even know why I care. I can't stop myself from crawling back to you after everything you to do me. I don't know why but I can't" She finishes and she's still staring into my eyes and I feel what she is going to say next will make or break us.

"I don't think I want to stop coming back to you, is that bad?" She says and I relax.

"No, its not bad, because I will always come back to you too, no matter what, Love." I say and she melts into my arms and that how we stay the rest of the night, her head on my chest, my arms around her waist, and our love on the tip of our tongues but none of us say anything but I know what we both want to say but we won't.

I'm in love with Abigail?