Meetings in the Subconsciousness

The Beginning

I saw her first in my dreams.

It wasn't much, but seeming someone you've never seen before in in your dreams is kind of groundbreaking. Especially since she was one of the most beautiful people I have ever seen in my life.

It was just a glimpse, of course, but for a second she looked me in the eye and then continued walking as if she had never seen me before either.

I'd say she looked rather shocked.

I woke up the next day, remembering every little detail about her, from the way her blonde hair shone in the sunlight of those streets of downtown, the way her eyes were this painstaking blue that could have arm-wrestled with the ocean and win. She was so gorgeous it left me wanting to see her just once more.

It was kind of scary.

Of course, that was only a week ago, and I, am, of course, continuing on with what is left of my high school life.

My boring, boring, life.

It starts off like this, seven in the morning, wake up, take a shower, get dressed and then eat some toast, say good bye to mom who is too busy on her computer to actually look up at me, go to the bust stop and wait. And wait and wait and wait. Eight fifteen the bus comes, and me, along with a nice group of people who are way more "popular" than me climb into it and we sit and wait. I sit in the front, closest to the exit, just in case my bus driver ends up falling asleep while driving and I have to save these god damn hormonal driven kids. We wait for another 30 minutes and then we get off the bus and I go to my first period class, which is Biology.

I wait, not really listening to my teacher who spews basically crap out of her mouth (like seriously how are you still a teacher?) and I write some off hand notes, not really caring because I already know everything. The cycle continues to second and third and fourth and then lunch, which is way too loud for me so I get my lunch as quickly as possible, and I probably don't have enough to pay for all of it anyways so I give half of it up and then continue on my merry way to the library.

I wait again, and maybe finish reading whatever has interested me that day until the bell rings. I quickly finish the lunch I had accidentally ignored to read and rush off to my sixth period class where I wait. I wait until eight period where school is officially over for that day and I walk to the bus stop and get in and wait. I go home, and greet my mother, who is busy with a phone call and waves at me to go somewhere else.

I go to my room, finish homework and then wait.

I'm always waiting.

•••

This morning is a bit different, I eat cereal, in fact, Fruity Pebbles which are actually a bit more fruitier than usual. It's nice.

"Don't just sit there, finish your breakfast and get out!" My mom barks at me from the sofa.

I swallow slowly and down the rest of the cereal, I wash the bowl and spoon quickly in the sink and head out. "Bye mom, love ya."

"Hurry up, I have an important phone call."

I nod and get out the door, closing it softly behind me. She's doing important work, I shouldn't disturb her at all. She's busy, I get that.

No you don't.

"Shut up." I tell myself and wrap my sweater tighter around me. It's fresh outside and in the February air I can see my breath. It's like my own little cloud, made by me and the earth. I like knowing this is my simple way of reminding myself that I'm still alive.

The bus stop is right in front of my house, and I already see a few strangling kids chilling here and there. I stand the farthest from them, enjoying the Stop Sign way more than I should be.