Bennie the Salmon appeared magically in a circular stone room with ugly, faded wallpaper and an atrocious shag carpet the color of cow barf and shit.
A purple ukulele with a completely blue eye hung from the ceiling. It regarded Bennie, then ignored him. Ominous ukulele music played from all directions; however, the effect was somewhat lost, as you can't really make ukulele music ominous. Seriously, try to imagine sinister and scary ukuleles.
Anyway, back to the bullsh-excuse me, the story.
A ukulele-shaped doorway appeared across from him. Bennie the Salmon shrugged his fishy shoulders and got up on his fishy legs, waddling awkwardly to the doorway.
Inside the door was a massive room with ugly purple carpet and wallpaper patterned with creepy smiley faces. There were five podiums before him, one in front of him, and two to the right and left of the center one.
Ukuleles sat in chairs behind them. Bennie was very intimidated by this sight.
"Bennie Bennison," the center one, a neon orange ukulele with a paper crown on it, said. "That's me," Bennie said, his blank, vacant gaze traveling to the one at the end, a plain, normal ukulele.
"Shoo!" it said. He shooed.
"Good. Anyway, you have broken the Ukulele Law!" the orange one said.
"Hold up. Where are we and why are we doing this?" Bennie said.
"This is the Ukulele Council!" Confetti rained from the ceiling at the words. The neon orange ukulele said, "And we are here to kill you."
"But I thought you were telling me what I did!"
"Oh, right. That." It sighed. "You broke the Ukulele Law. It states that you can't whisper into your pancakes at dawn; it angers the Mud Demon."
Bennie felt this was reasonable. "I was eating waffles, though," he said, "and it was afternoon. So..."
"Oh," the orange ukulele said. "Well. Executioner!"
"But why?" Bennie asked. "Because I want to," the neon orange ukulele said. "And I don't like salmon. So now you must die!"
And so Bennie was attacked by the ukulele on the far right, a purple one with orange polka dots.
Author's Note: I'm doing these now because why not. So, I hope you like this load of bull so far, since it's just being pulled out of my thoughts, and that's not a good thing. Well, that's all for now. Bye! :)
YOU ARE READING
A Salmon Named Bennie
HumorBennie the Salmon was just a regular fish-well, except for the fact that he liked a little grass on his waffles. Otherwise, he was just like every other fish in Falunapuna. Well, until the Ukulele Council summoned him, turning his very normal (and s...