Aint it awful to be young and suicidal

"My name is Charlotte."I said

"Suicide attempts--3 days without suicidal thoughts or actions--2 days." "your a fighter" kamire said "no,just screwed up" and "you think I am because I act pretty good" I said. she gave me the look. The look of underestimation.

She was the only one who seem to get this whole depression thing. School was hell though. It's like a constant reminder of how awful my life was. But anyway we walked out of my room silently. Kamire was always used. For big or small things. She was too nice. That's why I loved her. I was the "I really don't care" and she was the "I'm the sunshine to your dark cloud" but I didn't care. I think she was scared though. Scared I might go to far one day. I've tried but what if I actually committed to it. I'll mess up her innocence. Of life and such. On the other hand I was in the car now. Listening to sleeping with sirens. While kamire pretended to like it. She was a boy band kind of girl. I felt useless these days. Like I was not enough for her. The car stopped." Get out girl" kamire said. I did. we walked silently as I thought about how much I hated school. As she said "why" I was confused. "What" I said "why do you act this way?" "What way!" I replied "the way you live the world but screw your self over so much"she said forcefully. I've never heard her speak to me like this. I was scared. "I don't know kamire. I have no clue anymore. One day I'll be here and the next I'll be on the 5 o'clock news okay" I said . She gave me the look again but this time in forcing the why? But I am a kid.