Abandoned

Cap's New Mission

You jolted awake and a stifled scream unaware of where you were. You heard shuffling in the darkroom and immediately jumped out of the bed and flew past whoever was in the room and hit the lights. It was Steve and from the looks of it he had fallen asleep on the love seat in your quarters and was alarmed from being awoken from your scream and the flurry of you turning on the light in such a frenzy. His arms were up like you were a frightened animal. "Hey, it's just me, Blue. You're ok." You exhaled deeply, relieved that you were safe at home and it was Steve and not some creeper or HYRDA agent in your room. You had a nightmare and safe to say it freaked the shit out of you, thankfully not literally.

His gaze softened and turned rosy and his eyes darted down your body then he looked away. You looked down and you were in your lace bra and lace boy shorts. Several shades of red gracing your skin to complement the dark panty set. "D-did you undress me?" He shook his head. "No Wanda and Nat cleaned you up and put you to bed while I cleaned up, I just didn't want to leave you alone tonight. Slept on the sofa. I hope it was ok?" You nodded in response. "Of course." You looked at the clock, it was 2 am and you were tired from the mission. "I-I'm going to go back to bed. I'm exhausted." You narrowly walked past him taking in his clean linen and soap smell mixed with leather and climbed into your bed and scooted to the middle. He just stared at you for a beat. "It was dangerous what you did, doll." He voice was soft yet there was anger underlying it. "And I'd do it again Cap. We had no cover and they were trying to kill all of us." He put his hands in his slow slung sweat pants and shook his head. "Not you. I've gone over it a thousand times in my head. Talked to the team. They seemed to want you. Tony and FRIDAY are trying to decode the information that we extracted. It may be nothing but if its something, ten to one I think it has something to do with you." You sighed and rubbed your eyes. "I'm nothing to them Steve. A sideshow Dr. made me??" He sat on the edge of the bed and you could see the lines of his face and you sat up. You pressed your fingers to smooth out the creases between his brows with a small sympathetic smile. "You're special. I have a feeling in my gut that it was a trap to get to you. I need to you trust me." You could see that, at least tonight, you weren't going to win the argument and to be honest you just want to rest. "M'kay. I trust you." His shoulder relaxed a bit and he made a move to get up. "S-Stay. I mean will you stay with me again?" His eyes widened and then he nodded. You slowly laid on your side with your back to him and he laid down and curved his body towards yours. "N'ver been the big spoon." You laughed. "Are you the little spoon often, Rogers. And with who do you spoon with?" He laughed and his breath on the back of your neck tickled giving you shivers. "I may not be a virgin but I haven't cuddled with women a lot. Most of the time they just want a one and done with Captain America-Steve Rogers isn't really their type." You scoffed at his comment. "Wow, well they're fucking idiots." He laughed and pulled you closer. "Especially because I'm finding that your one helluva good cuddler, never knew I liked it." He was silent for a minute. "You and Bucky didn't cuddle?" You bit your lip. "Yes and no. He and I would lay together and console each other during nightmares but not hold each other like this. It was more like holding each other to keep from falling apart. I think that's why would've never worked. Too broken and damaged." You could feel his face dip and his mouth settle on the back of your neck. "You'll find the one that'll make you feel whole someday. You deserve the world. You protect others before yourself and make everyone laugh and keep me humble and like me for Steve not Cap. You just need to stop seeing yourself as a sideshow because none of us see you as that." You just hummed in response.

"Damn you, woman." He leaned over you and you were slightly startled. " I know you've had a shit life and my best friend was a metal-armed ass hat. But my new mission is to make you see yourself the way we see you. Badass and amazing." You smiled under his intense gaze but in the back of your mind, you still heard how quickly he said No to Bucky when asked if you were his and the disgust at the thought of being romantically involved. Or at least the disgust you thought you heard, it was hard to convince yourself that when he was so close to you and held you closer than that damn shield of his. He laid back down when you rolled over and put his face flush with your neck both of you dozed off. Truth was, you were orphaned and then captured and tortured by the creep show doctor for years on years. Then the Avengers rescued you. You mistakingly became close to Bucky between shared experiences but both of you were to traumatized to be good for one another. Yet, you still loved him and he would be perfect for someone, just not for you. He nearly broke you beyond repair and yet here you were, stronger than before but yet still would any man ever want a woman like you. A tortured fighter with the self-esteem negative 40?