The Life Of 'Bello (Intersex/Camila)

I Love Your Smile

(Pic has nothing to do w the story... its just my baby sister and me looking like flies😂)

2008

I stare at myself in the mirror, shirtless, with a stoic expression. My hair, now short, swooped up in the front. I study my facial features. My nose flared as I notice how feminine I looked. The only thing I liked was my sharp jawline. I look down at my chest; more prominent than any boy should have them.

Especially one as small as me.

I hated my body.

Instead of looking like Sisco, I'm looking more like Maddie. My muscles aren't getting any bigger, just toner. I look soft and girly. I let out a deep sigh. I should be sleeping, but I couldn't. My chest was hurting me; like they're sore and sensitive.

I didn't realize how long I had been standing there until my alarm went off. It's 6 already?

I go over to my clock and turned it off. I already can't wait to come back home from that school. I don't know what's wrong with me. A few moments later, I hear my dad's heavy footsteps come down the hall. "Rise, Niños!" His voice echoes throughout the house.

I hurried a slipped on one of my oversized shirts just before he opened my door. "León?" His eyebrows furrow, "Huh, first time you were up before I came in here." He humors.

I chuckle nervously, "Uh, yeah."

"Well, get dressed, Papito. Today's a special day, huh?" He winks at me. I nod with a faint smile, "Okay, Papa." He shoots me one last smile before we both hear the loud wailing of my little sister.

"I'm gonna go get her before your mamí wakes up," he announces before leaving me in the hallway's illumination. I sigh in relief, going back to my dresser and picking out a pair of pants.

I threw on my red GAP hoodie and some baggy blue jeans before slipping on my favorite pair of Nikes. I mess with my hair a few times, trying to get my swoop in my desired spot.

But since I'm out of hair gel, it keeps falling back in place.

I sigh in irritation as I look at myself harder in the mirror once again.

I try not to think about how I should change my name to Carla or some crap and instead walk out into the hall towards Damien's room to borrow some gel. I knock twice on his door, hearing him spray something before answering for me to come in.

I open his door, watching him put the can of body spray down and running a hand through his hair. He turns to me, nodding with a smile. "Happy birthday, Léon," he says, grabbing his red button up shirt and slipping it on.

"Thanks. But, uh, can I borrow some gel? I ran out yesterday," he picks up the small container and tosses it my way. I catch it flawlessly with one hand, thanking him again.

"Hey, you ever thought about playing baseball this year? Season's starting soon," he says, examining himself in the mirror. I shrug, "I might. Ed said he's playing and Randy said he'd think about it."

"You should, it's tradition," he jokes, being that he played when he was my age. I roll my eyes, "Whatever." I walk back to my room, turning my light on, this time, and going to my mirror to fix my hair. I admit, I miss my long hair so much, but I look less like a girl.

But briefly studying my features again, I still look like a girl.

After I had finished, I hear mu family come down the hall, cheering. I look at them, trying to hide the smile on my face. But I failed once I see Sofia clapping and laughing. I take her hand in my finger and kiss her cheek. "Happy birthday, Papito," Maddie says, bouncing Sofi lightly.