Tomorrow Never Knows

Chapter Five

        Standing by the wall of the Casbah reminded me of the dance where I met Kevin all too much. Life whirled all around me, with people dancing, singing, laughing and crying, while I sat observing. It was like an elaborate performance, with me being part of the audience while everyone else was putting on the production.

        It was so typical of me to scare myself into letting my life pass me by. But not tonight. I wouldn't and couldn't let it happen this time. I quickly looked around and sidled up to the first guy I saw.

        "Hello," I tapped him on the shoulder and batted my eyelashes, trying my best at whatever my idea of flirting was.

        "Hello, Dolly," he looked me up and down, "Nice threads." he nodded approvingly. His forwardness sickened me slightly, but I couldn't afford to be picky.

        "Wha'dya say you buy me a drink, hmm?" I said in a voice dripping with sugar, rubbing his arm. He looked at me in confusion and I saw an expression almost of amusement pass over his face.

        "What, here?" he spat. Seeing that I was more confused than he, he let out a long, mean laugh.

        "Do you want me to buy you a warm glass of milk? I hear they have an esspresso machine that's real nice. All the apple butter in the world couldn't get ye a stiff drink here. You might have a real classy chassis, girl, but ye need to get with it." He laughed at me again before walking away.

        Feeling thoroughly rejected and like an idiot, I decided to move closer to the stage. Tears stung my eyes as I went. This day couldn't get much worse.

        'So that's what I get for trying. Made fun of,' I thought, 'Fabulous.'

        As I got closer and closer to the performers, the deafening sounds of the club only got louder and louder. Everyone around me was having a great time, dancing and laughing, with me as the calm and dreary eye of the storm. Finally, I made it three or four rows back from where the band was playing just as a song ended, drawing cheers from the crowd.

        "Thank you, thank you! Well, we'd like to carry on then with this next song. Its one we've written and it's a bit slower, it's called In Spite of All the Danger. So if you'll just grab your girl or your man now!" I realized that the boys on the stage were the ones I avoided by staying in my car earlier. They weren't kidding when they said they had no drummer, all four of them were playing guitars. I silently cursed them for playing a slow song now, of all times.

        Out of the corner of my eye I caught a glimpse of a boy putting away a small silver flask.

        "Do you think you could spare a little for the lady?" I questioned, raising my eyebrows innocently. The boy smirked and looked me up and down.

        "I like your style. Sure, there's more where this came from back in my car." he laughed, handing the liquor to me.

        "Thanks a lot!" I chirped, downing the whole thing in seconds, ignoring the burning sensation in my throat and the foul chemical taste in my mouth. I'd never been much of a drinker in high school, or at parties with Kevin. I would often been called a square or a drag because of this, sometimes jokingly, sometimes not. But I needed this tonight, if only just to boost my confidence, and whatever was in there was already making me feel warm inside.

        "Woah there, baby, don't get ahead of yourself!" he laughed.

        "I can handle it." I insisted, though I really wasn't too sure myself.

        He wet his lips and looked at me again in approval.

        "I like a girl that can handle a little drink now and then. Dance with me." he asked suddenly.