SET IT OFF → ETHAN DOLAN

CHAPTER 3.

ETHAN DOLAN

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

"precious." i groaned out, as the sun shined out into our beautiful, cream colored room. i sat up and looked around to see that our clothes were all over the floor. making me smile, because last night was one of the best nights we ever had together.

usually we were fighting, which is always me starting it with the smallest things. which ends up, with her getting hurt, me getting pissed off and run out to drink my problems away.

you probably always wondered why i always act like this, to tell you the truth, i can't really say. all i can say that when my twin brother, grayson who committed suicide.

i was left depressed, broken and very lonely. i started drinking and partying every week. skipping school, not giving fucks about life but that's when until clementine came around. she was the happiness of my days. always cheered me up when i was about to break down. stood by me when my father kicked me out the house. stood her ground, when i would set off on her. even though she was afraid of me,

she was always there for me.

we both came from rough pasts in our life, her father being a huge abuser, beating on her, calling her names and even raping her in her sleep.

i remember she came to my house, crying her eyes out, shaking heavily and could barely speak. she told me everything, and it angered me so much that i felt the need to take her in and protect with all costs. and her mom, oh god her mom was the biggest drug addict you can think of.

it was disgusting to see her parents, living like that, unfortunately for clem she was raised by piece of shit parents.

i snapped out of my thoughts when i heard a creek of a door open and close. i saw clem walking out, wrapping her body around with a white towel, while drying her hair with another white towel but smaller. she looked up and smiled at me, making my heart quench.

i smiled back, praising her and thanking her silently in my head for dealing with my bullshit attitude.

she walked closer and sat on the white, fluffy comforter close to me, then facing me.

"good morning, baby." she said softly, ruffling my hair.

"hey mama." i looked all over her body. she blushed at the nickname, i tugged her closer to me making her sit on my lap while i was laying down.

we both stared into each other's eyes, gleaming with hope and lust.

"last night was fun." she bit her lip.

i nodded and gripped her hips, "hell yeah, little mama." making her slowly grind on me.

she moaned out and making her unwrap her towel slowly. i snaked my hand up around her waist, slowly moving it down between her thighs rubbing her softly.

she threw her head back and moaned louder, pushing herself down onto my fingers deeper. i started to add another finger making it the third finger.

she gasped out, making her legs started to shake. i started to move quicker and harder, making smirk even more.

i suddenly stopped and sucked on my fingers, staring at her shocked expression.

"what the hell ethan." she crossed her arms.

i gripped her waist again, and pulled her into my neck whispering into her ear.

"you taste divine, little mamas."

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LATER

i walked up to the grey tall headstone, hearing the grass crunch under my dark boots. i sighed and looked around the cemetery, the grass was nicely cut. everyone's headstones were, up to date or slowly crumbing away.

i slowly gotten onto my knees and stare at grayson's headstone, i clenched my knuckles and sighed. lifting my hand, i started to feel the cold headstone. making my heart start to ache with painful memories.

"grayson, i can't believe you are gone. i know i should've went with you and been awesome older brother that you deserved. but no i was that asshole, who destroyed our youtube career making you be more distant from me. i know i fucked up, i know i'm a huge mess. i miss you so much, i missed us being so happy. i don't know why i ignored you and been an asshole to you. when you got cheated on i wasn't there, because i was so busy kissing and making out with other girls. to the point you've started suffering from depressed, and left so alone. that your only other choice was by taking your life. and no that wasn't the answer gray." i sniffled heavily.

"that was never the fucking answer! you had to fucking kill yourself because i wasn't there!" i yelled out and kicked his tombstone.

i clenched my fists and breathed heavily, rubbing my face aggressively. i backed away, and looked up to the sky.

"i miss you a lot grayson, why did you leave me in this shitty world? why didn't you come and talk to me. i know i was a horrible person, but you were not the only person suffering, i was too."

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CLEMENTINE

i sat alone in the kitchen with a cup of soda, watching outside the window seeing rain drain the grass heavily.

it's been hours since, ethan left and i was starting to worry. i tapped my fingers against the table, humming a song. and thinking about what to make for dinner today.

suddenly the door slammed, i frozen and looked out from the corner in panic, but relaxed when i saw ethan walking in all bruised up.

i stood by the kitchen and watched him, walked up to me. he stared into my eyes and then all of sudden he grabbed my throat aggressively, making me lose conscious immediately.

"don't leave me, clementine you're all i got." he choked me tighter. "don't fucking leave me!" he yelled out.

i nodded and sniffled feeling the lightheadedness kicking in, he let go and hugged me instantly. i felt wetness into my shoulders.

he was crying.

"why did he have to go so soon?" he sniffled out

i hugged him tightly and cradle him into my arms. telling him i will always be here, and love him no matter what.

even though i was terrified.

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SET IT OFF
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+ - i apologize for the depressing chapter. but, if you are having depressing thoughts, feel free to always message me! you're not alone, please reach someone if you're to the point that life is over for you. because it's not, let's help and spread awareness 🕊.

SUICIDE HOTLINE:
1-800-273-8255

have a blessed day, and remember you're beautiful/handsome and everyone loves you.

- m
6/7/17