Our secret (teacher x student)

Sorry- Explanation

Not an update but please read.

Hey guys. I am really sorry for not updating for so long. Let me just explain to you guys where I've been. First of all, I've been struggling to write for a while now. It takes me like 10 minutes just to write 4 sentences.It's honestly so frustrating but it seems to be taking quite a long time to pass. ( I hope not too much longer I have English assessments soon.)

However, that is not the only reason. Last chapter I was saying how I was in a better mind set. It did not last long. I'm severely stressed and have been having panic attacks quite a lot lately. I've never dealt well with stress and there's just so much work, homework and tests at school right now. I also push myself way too much and aren't completely happy with myself unless my work is 'perfect'. Say if i get a good score but my friend's is better, I will be happy for them but mad at myself for not getting the better score. Lots of people consider me one of the smartest in my year as well so they always assume I'll get the best marks which is even more pressure. This stress makes it even harder for me to write because I need to be more or less relaxed and be in a clear head space.

Also, I'm not going to say too much but two of my closest friends are dealing with some issues and are going through incredibly hard times. They text me quite regularly and we often have hours long conversations with me trying to help them with support and just listening. Unfortunately, that's all I can do and I often find myself crying because of how useless I feel. This adds on to my stress and isn't helping at all. I of course won't say this to them because they once stopped talking to me about it because they thought they were worrying me but that's what I'm here for. I will continue to listen and help get them through this. I know they will succeed. If not then I'm afraid it's all my fault.

All these things are making me completely overwhelmed with stress and I can't write. I try to push myself to write from time to time but I literally just get 3 crappy sentences after 20 minutes before I give up. Me trying to write is actually just adding on even more to the stress. The votes and comments however are making me feel happier and at least little less stressed knowing that I am doing this story good enough for people to like it so far. I just hope you continue to read. I will need more time and for that I'm so sorry. After most of my tests are finished I'll be a little less stressed hopefully resulting in me being able to write a bit more. When this happens I will probably update an extract of the next chapter as a trailer before it's finished. Please hang on. I'm sorry.

Jazzy xoxo