Sleepwalking {GTA V}

6: Rose On Your Coffin Door

Michael's POV

Amanda and I were woken up by my phone ringing on the nightstand next to my head. I groaned and rubbed my eyes. I reached out to it and flipped my phone open. My heart instantly began to pound in my chest.

"Who is it?" Amanda said in a tired voice.

"It's Kane, Isabel's dad." I say. She perks up and I see worry in her eyes, mirroring mine. Why else would he call at 2 in the morning. Isabel had been admitted into the hospital recently and I knew it has happened.

"Hello?" I say into my phone.

"Hi Michael," he says, and just by his tone I know. I look at Amanda with the look and she understands. "Isabel passed." His voice cracks and I know he's moments from completely breaking down.

I didn't know what to say. I was at a loss for words. "I'm so sorry, Kane." My mouth pushes out.

"It's not just me to be sorry for. Alana doesn't have a mother anymore." I knew she'd have that maternal loneliness weighing on her back her whole life and it made my heart ache. To endure this much pain early on, and not even know it yet is going to take a huge toll. I was beyond blessed to have Amanda, and Alana would realize that too someday.

"What - when did it happen?"

"About ten minutes ago. She passed quietly. No warning, no reaction, she was asleep. The heart rate monitor went flat and there was nothing they could do."

"I understand. I'm so sorry."

"Thank you Michael. I'll let you go now, I'll call you back in the morning."

"Okay, goodnight."

"Bye,"

I closed my phone and cursed myself. Goodnight, really? That's all I could say? That mans daughter just died for Christ's sake. The mother of my daughter just died.

"Oh my God," Amanda says sadly and slightly shakes her head. "I can't believe it."

The new year had just started. 2001 took a dark turn early. It was only January 7th and Alana was only 4 months old. I don't even know how to tell her this when she's older. "I don't know what to do." I admit.

"It's okay," she says. "Just try to get sleep and we'll deal with this in the morning." She suggests and we lay back down. I know neither of us fell back asleep. I laid on my back staring at the ceiling while my mind wondered until the sun came up.

***

"Are you all ready?" I sigh and look at Jimmy and Tracey in my rear view mirror. We're all dressed in black as we had arrived at the church for the funeral. God and I don't get along, so I don't find myself here often. Or at all. Trevor offered to come but I didn't want to bring some crazy looking guy to a somewhat peaceful event.

A chorus of 'yeahs' sounded throughout my car. I turned the key and it shut off and we all got out. I opened the backseat door and pulled Alana out of her car seat. She was asleep and I had to lay her head on my shoulder for she couldn't hold her head up by herself yet. She was nearly consumed by the large blue winter coat she had on.

I held Tracey's hand with my free one while Amanda held Jimmy's, and we walked across the parking lot in the dirty snow along with several other's who came to remember Isabel. Lots of people were around her age, 19, 20.

The air had to be beyond freezing but the funeral was indoors. Her parents couldn't afford it so I stepped in and paid for everything. It was the least I could do.

Before the funeral started, many of Isabel's friends approached me to see Alana and finally meet her. I could tell it made Amanda uneasy but she didn't say anything. Jimmy and Tracey sat quietly in a pew with Amanda and I was thankful they weren't starting fights with each other or playing video games loudly. I probably would've kicked their asses, but they kept their heads down and stayed quiet.

"Bella said she was the cutest baby she'd ever seen and I thought it was probably just a mom thing to think that about their kids, but she was right," a brunette with thick rimmed glasses says as she gently rocks Alana in her arms. I smile and keep my eyes on my sleeping baby.

"It's absolutely true," I agree.

"It's the other thing true though?" She looks up at me.

I raise an eyebrow. "What?"

"Are you like forty and have a family of your own?" I'm shocked by her question. Fucking millennial don't know boundaries.

"I'm uh, gonna sit down." I say and she hands my baby back to me. I can feel her eyes on me as I walk to the pew where my family was seated. I glance at her as I sit down and she raises an eyebrow and I knew she answered her own question. It made me wonder what Isabel had been telling her friends.

I look forward and see the closed coffin surrounded by light pink flowers and it's a beautiful display. The botanist and Valerie did a great job picking out flowers. I don't know shit about them and probably would've fucked it up.

Valerie and Kane sit in front of us in the very front pew. Everyone who arrived had to share their condolences with them and I know it must be exhausting to be surrounded by so many and to be reminded of your daughters death. I don't know what I'd do if I lost any of my children. I also don't know what I'd do if I lost Amanda and had to raise a nine year old, an eight year old, and a four month old on my own.

We say a quick hello and the funeral begins soon after. Amanda takes Alana and I hold my shaking hands with my sweaty palms face down on my thighs. Suits are so uncomfortable, I could never wear one to a regular 9 to 5 job.

A priest stood before the church and talked greatly in her name. Her parents decided to do a closed casket for they didn't want to think precious baby during the embalming process nor did they want to think of her body in flames. I'd probably do the same. It's a horrifying thought.

After the funeral came the burial. We all went outside into the cemetery where they lowered the casket into the ground. It was surrounded by roses this time, and it haunts me that she'll always be in the cold.

"She is survived by her parents, Kane and Valerie, and her newborn daughter Alana." The priest says and concludes the funeral. They didn't want us to see the coffin descend into the ground where it would forever be. Isolated from the world.

We said our goodbyes to Isabel's parents and everyone but the staff began to leave the cemetery, but I decided to stay for a moment. "I'll meet you guys in the car okay? We'll be just a moment." I say to Amanda. She nods and takes Jimmy and Tracey to the car with my keys.

The staff give us a moment and go back inside the church. It was just me and Alana now. She was finally awake with her eyes wide open. "It's time to say goodbye now," my voice slightly cracks as I say it. I got on one knee next to the coffin. "Say goodbye to mommy." I say softly.

She looks at me for a moment and her eyes wonder to the dark brown coffin. To my surprise, her little hand reaches out and touches the coffin. Only for a moment, but it meant everything to me. My eyes watered over and I tried to blink them away, but the tears rolled down my face. "Fuck," I say and stand up.

There was a wet patch on my knee from the snow and made me feel bone cold and the wind made it worse. "Screw this cold, right?" I say and smile down at her as I'm walking back to the car that's in the nearly empty parking lot. She smiles up at me and it makes me freeze in the middle of the cemetery as my eyes tear up again. "Oh my God... I love you so much." I hold her against my a little tighter and move my feet again. "We'll get past this. Nobody will ever hurt you."